Hm. Courtney Love says that pretty girls are bad in bed because they know they can get away with it.

Meanwhile the “homely” girls (Love's word choice, not mine) have to work a bit harder to, well, get it harder and therefore are better lays?

[EDITOR'S NOTE: Of course she thinks so. Exhibit A.]

Her words: “Pretty girls just lie there. Us girls who grew up a little more homely have to try a lot harder. That's why pretty girls never threaten me – it's like, yeah, you want to take me on? Take me on. Go for it.”

Now, I dunno how many pretty girls she's fucked. Probably just as many as I have. But for Pete's (and Patricia's) sake, if a dude's penis is already in the gal's vag, making effort to prove one's self is relatively redundant, don't you think?

Unless said home-girl is hoping for repeat business, who cares whether or not she puts out a gold-medal performance? The goal is to her rocks off, and once mission's accomplished it's time to clock out and get a manicure.

I've never known a man to kick a girl out of bed mid-stroke when he realizes she's not putting in 110 percent.

Unless he's got a sideline bench stocked with some less Love-like alternates (let's go with Nicky Hilton, Peaches Geldorf and…Brooke Hogan) he's not going to blow the whistle and call a time out.

At least not until the other whistle blows. Then she'd better have her satchel, wool stockings and library card ready to grab and go in a flash – and don't expect a farewell trophy in a form of lingerie. (In this case, floral cotton culottes.)

Everyone knows homely girls don't wear underwear.

Oh, and Courtney – challenge accepted.

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