Oh, the power of the radio. When I get behind a microphone or in front of an HD handicam (even though I'm…what did A.V. Flox call me? A techtard? Classy.) I turn on. Turned on in a way that differs from the usual. But it's just as stimulating.

Get me on a tangent and the words flow like saliva in Ms. Flox's mouth at the mention of cumshot facials. No really, I saw it happen on the air.

Ya see, we went on The Single Life, an online radio show hosted by former Penthouse Pet Sam Phillips, who also happens to write alongside yours truly for AfterDarkLA. It was the Halloween episode so we all decked out in last-minute costumes (80's Oprah took my cake) and headed over to the studio for a couple of hours.

Ms. Flox took the time to write out some of the tangent-laden conversation we had on the air in case you guys haven't yet downloaded the podcast. But it's only one juicy segment of a seriously delicious vitamin C-filled orgasm orange so I truly recommend you listen to the whole thing.

But MAN my word vomit. Whether you find it entertaining and endearing or annoying as hell, whatever. It's 100-percent Barbie.

Ms. Flox's uncanny straight-shot monotone accent sounds hotter than my nasal ramble, and that makes me upset. (But only for a few minutes, because being upset causes crow's feet and I'm far to young and virile to have that kind of permanent emotion on my face.)

From the transcript:

Barbie: During the beginning of this feud — before the lingerie duel — AV spent a

Porn star Jean Valjean, post-haircut

Porn star Jean Valjean, post-haircut

lot of time — and it was a lot of fun, I thought it was really cool — asking me questions that she would answer too, and we had thirty seconds to respond. She asked what our ideal mate was and I said it was a combination of Amelie, Jean Valjean from Les Miserables and —

AV: [Laughs] I'm so tickled that you actually know who that is.

Barbie: You're so silly to assume — I meant Jean Valjean the pornstar. Anyway, and the Albanian that I fucked twice last week — and that's actually a real person. Who I fucked twice!

AV: Congratulations, darling!

Barbie: I know! He had a real penis that went erect when I looked at it.

AV: He had a pulse and everything!

Now try to tell me you don't want to immediately listen to the entire episode. Cuz you'd be lying, and you know what happens to liars…

…they get bad BJs.

DOWNLOAD IT HERE LIKE OMG TOTALLY ROFL.

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