Variety (via Beatcrave) reports that your favorite Huey-Lewis-obsessed-yuppie-serial-killer-novel-turned-arthouse-cult-movie, the one and only American Psycho, is being adapted into a Broadway musical. (Which means we'll get it at the Pantages with Justin Guarini playing Patrick Bateman sometime around the Mayan apocalypse.)

From Variety:

The brewing tuner adaptation of “American Psycho” has found its creative team, with Duncan Sheik penning music and lyrics and scribe Roberto Aguirre-Sacasa writing the book.

Based on the 1991 Bret Easton Ellis novel that centers on a Wall Street banker who's also a serial killer, “American Psycho” incorporates multiple references to the popular music of the 1980s, the era in which the story is set. Producers have said they expect the original score to share that '80s flavor.

Is this the craziest idea or what? Can you imagine your aunt from the OC or the “Glee” demographic paying good money to see Patrick Bateman stuff a live rat up a hooker's vagina at the Pantages? (For fans of the film only: the rat scene is the highlight of the book and was curiously omitted from the classy film adaptation.)

[Patrick Bateman musing on Phil Collins, brilliantly, after the jump]

More info about the creative team, from Variety:

Sheik nabbed a 2007 Tony as the composer of “Spring Awakening.” He's also at work on legit projects including “Nero” and “Whisper House,” which recently opened at the Old Globe in San Diego.

Aguirre-Sacasa, a writer on HBO skein “Big Love,” has penned plays including “Based on a Totally True Story,” “Good Boys and True” and “Dark Matters.”

(Sheik, of course, is also known as a 1990s alternapopper, Lisa Loeb associate, and responsible for the semi-hit single “Barely Breathing.”)

All the music monologs from the movie adaptation are here, though embedding has been disabled (boo!).

Advertising disclosure: We may receive compensation for some of the links in our stories. Thank you for supporting LA Weekly and our advertisers.