Michele StuevenEmma Heming Willis, Cleo Wade, and Tess Sanchez are just a few authors who came together for a day dedicated to books and community at Zibby’s Bookshop in Santa Monica on Saturday, Oct. 3, for a new interactive kind of book event that offers intimate, community-driven alternatives to traditional book tours.
Hosted by bookstore owner, author, and book-fluencer Zibby Owens, the retreat offered readers a rare opportunity to interact with their favorite authors and attend a launch party for Owens’ new book, Between Chapters, as well as a private movie screening.
Authors discussed topics like holding onto hope, joy, and connection through life’s unexpected changes, the power of reading to help kids navigate a complex world, and book club favorites; some of this year’s most anticipated reads.
“I love the laughter, the nonstop conversations, the enriching discussions, and helping facilitate friendships that will linger long after the chairs have been put away,” Owens tells LA Weekly. “ I hope they take away a long list of inspiring quotes from the authors they heard (I know I did) and the desire to come back to the next one.”
Heming Willis, whose husband, actor Bruce Willis, suffers from frontotemporal dementia, discussed her book, The Unexpected Journey: Finding Strength, Hope, and Yourself on the Caregiving Path.
Zibby’s Bookshop Retreat from left: Tess Sanchez, Zibby Owens, Emma Heming Willis, Cleo Wade (Innis Casey Photography)
“Caregiving can be very isolating,” she told LA Weekly, for anyone who needs support. “It’s easy to feel like no one understands what you’re going through. But what I’ve learned is that there’s a whole community of people who do. My advice is to find those people. An organization dedicated to your loved one’s disease can help you connect, whether through an online support group or in person. Something shifts when you can share honestly and feel seen and heard. You realize you don’t have to do this alone.
So many caregivers come into this experience knowing very little about the disease or what being a care partner will ask of them. I think it’s important to look back at where you started and recognize how much you’ve learned and grown along the way. It’s easy to focus on what you think you’re not doing, and forget everything you’re already doing. You’re doing the best you can in an incredibly difficult situation you weren’t prepared for. Give yourself some grace.”
The retreat also included lunch at the nearby Courtyard Kitchen on Montana Ave. and panels covering how to hold onto hope, joy, identity, and connection through life’s unexpected changes with authors Wade, Heming Willis, and Sanchez, as well as female identity in transition with panelists Jordan Roter, Laura Tremaine, and Annabelle Gurwitch.
Lunch at Courtyard Kitchen (Innis Casey Photography)
Other thoughts shared by panelists:
Laura Dave, New York Times bestselling author of The First Time I Saw Him, about advice to aspiring authors:
“Try to write the book that you would be excited to read and give yourself plenty of grace while you do it. Writing is wonderful work, but it’s also hard work, and the best way to do it well is to find joy in the process.
Cleo Wade, New York Times bestselling author about how to find happiness in everyday life:
“I am not sure we can protect ourselves from overwhelm, but we can prepare for it so that when it arrives, we are better able to manage it. Our existence is a mind, body, and soul connection. When those connections are fragile, the smallest thing can throw us into a state of immense stress. Your mind needs hope and affirmation toward positive outcomes, and a belief that we will be okay. Your body needs movement and rest. Your soul needs joy, laughter, expression, and generosity. Like most things on this planet, we need care to survive. Many of us do not know what that care looks like or which parts of ourselves need it.”
Annabelle Gurwitch, bestselling author of The End of My Life is Killing Me, about finding unexpected joy:
“One of my strategies for cultivating joys also happens to be one of Los Angeles’s great pleasures. In The End of My Life is Killing Me, I write about Stammtische, that’s a German word for a regular’s table at a pub, and it’s come to mean scheduling regular get-togethers with friends. We often defer plans to big occasions- ‘Oh, I’ll see my friends at my birthday or when I get tickets for a show at the Greek (a favorite activity) or sometime in the distant future.’ It can turn into a Bob Mankoff New Yorker cartoon- How’s never, does it never work for you? And you realize you haven’t seen your friends in months. Knowing you are scheduled in advance creates scaffolding that not only strengthens friendships, but you have something to look forward to. It’s important to me to schedule activities that also have other value. This is where we’re so fortunate in Los Angeles. One of my favorite stammtisch to schedule is walks in Griffith Park with friends. It doesn’t have to be a marathon or the most challenging of hikes; just walking in nature, sometimes in silence, is so restorative. I also have 2 friends who meet up at my place for tea one Sunday a month. We’re like church ladies without the church. It’s also an affordable and great, relaxed day. I look forward to our “Sunday Friends Stammtisch” all month. Sometimes, we read passages from books together; sometimes we just talk. Guaranteed joy.”
Zibby’s Bookshop Retreat panelists from left: Gabrielle Korn, Laura Dave, and Zibby Owens (Innis Casey Photography)