Paul T. BradleyThe reports that the mayor wants Occupy L.A. to leave City Hall raise the question: if they do have to leave, where would they go?
The occupiers have already expanded to obvious places like UCLA and Bank of America Plaza. L.A.'s own Wall Street has been slightly occupied for years now (it is smack in the middle of Skid Row, after all) and most of their other options seem worse than where they are. The city at one point offered office space at a former B. Dalton bookstore, though that offer was rescinded and rejected.
So what about those other places that we Angelenos love to hate, or the ones that we love to love a little too much — the places that might as well be occupied?
Here are our suggestions for places in L.A. for the occupiers to consider.
8. Occupy Grauman's Chinese Theater.
With the daily gaggle of freaks, geeks, hustlers and tourists, OLA would get maximum visibility and cause extreme nuisance to those who create extreme nuisance.
7. Occupy 101 / 405 Interchange
Considered one of the worst traffic bottlenecks in the country…who would notice if thousands of protesters took up residence there?
Credit: Flickr/Nathan Jongewaard
6. Occupy Taco Zone Truck in Echo Park.
We don't dare question the motivations of the scenester masses, but Taco Zone is hardly the best taco in a half-mile radius, and yet, night after night, a line of upwardly hip kids waits there patiently for a taste of mediocrity. OLA could easily drive up business to better trucks or add “better tacos” to their list of demands.
5. Occupy Diddy Reise Cookies
We mean this in the best possible way — who would notice if a bunch of kids and protesters took up residence at the Diddy Riese line? The best part about this whole experience for our OLA friends? $1.50 ice cream sandwiches. Nuff said.
The dreaded Cinespia line
4. Occupy Cinespia Hollywood Forever Cemetery Screenings
This is another one we mean in the best possible way. There are some showings in this revered series that you might as well be camping out for, as the lines stretch down Santa Monica Blvd. The only drawback is that they'd have to wait until late spring…or be really really early to the next screening.
Credit: Facebook.com/mylalive
3. Occupy L.A. Live
With its dozens of mega-corporate chain restaurants and the worst of all bar/restaurant combination — the ESPN Zone — L.A. Live could use an influx of unwashed anti-corporate crusaders. The sign-bearing and tent-dwelling masses might make it look less like a Disney version of a fake downtown (as the Twihards already did).
2. Occupy Pink's Hot Dogs
Are the hot dogs so good that they warrant a line that might as well be a permanent encampment? At Pink's, OLA protestors would have a pre-assembled mass from which to draw crowd strength. And, unlike at City Hall, they'd probably never have to leave.
Credit: supperclub.com
1. Occupy Anything Defined As A “Supper Club”
Nightclubs in Hollywood were already up to eleven on the douche-ometer, and now they have Supper Clubs. Don't ask what that means. Just ask that the occupiers come by and take it over.
Follow @PaulTBradley and @LAWeeklyArts on Twitter.
Advertising disclosure: We may receive compensation for some of the links in our stories. Thank you for supporting LA Weekly and our advertisers.