Yes, there will be fireworks going off in your head this holiday weekend. We know our LA Weekly readers.

But don't be a Lohan and stumble or, worse, get your ass busted for DUI.

And, frankly, as you celebrate our quasi-independence from Mexico (joking), there's no excuse.

While it's nearly impossible to get around this town with a car, the Automobile Club of Southern California got you:

For the 15th year in a row they're offering a 4th of July weekend free “tipsy tow.”

That means you can call this number (800-400-4AAA) and they'll take you and vehicle ride home — free. This applies to seven-mile trips and only lasts from 6 p.m. Saturday until 11:59 p.m. Monday.

The program covers most of the counties around here, namely L.A., O.C., San Diego, Riverside, San Bernardino, Ventura, etc., etc. (are we leaving anyone out?).

Now, should you decline said offer, the LAPD will also give you a free ride … to jail.

The department has so many DUI checkpoints waiting for you we're just going to quote the LAPD's own press release on this:

July 1, 2011 (Friday) – Sobriety Checkpoint from 8 p.m. to 2 a.m. in LAPD's Devonshire Area on Reseda Boulevard at Nordhoff Street

July 1, 2011 (Friday) – Sobriety Checkpoint from 6 p.m. to 12 a.m. in LAPD's North Hollywood Area on Lankershim Boulevard at Cumpston Street

July 2, 2011 (Saturday) – Sobriety Checkpoint from 8 p.m. to 2 a.m. in LAPD's Southwest Area on Figueroa Street at 40th Place

July 3, 2011 (Sunday) – DUI Saturation Patrol from 12 p.m. to 8 p.m. in LAPD's Foothill Area

July 3, 2011 (Sunday) – DUI Saturation Patrol from 12 p.m. to 8 p.m. in LAPD's Harbor Area

July 4, 2011 (Monday) – Sobriety Checkpoint from 4 p.m. to 10 p.m. in LAPD's West Los Angeles Area on Pacific Coast Highway at Temescal Canyon Road.

Added, from the sheriff's department (with no specific location given):

Personnel from the Los Angeles County Sheriff's Department, West Hollywood Patrol Station, will be conducting a DUI/DL Checkpoint on Friday, June 30, 2011 from 9 PM until approximately 3 AM. The checkpoint will be conducted in the City of West Hollywood.

Don't say we didn't warn you.

-With reporting from City News Service. Got news? Email us. Follow us on Twitter, too: @dennisjromero.

Advertising disclosure: We may receive compensation for some of the links in our stories. Thank you for supporting LA Weekly and our advertisers.