Quit Acting Like This Jacket Is a Big Hairy Deal

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Wed, Oct 2, 2013 at 9:59 AM

click to enlarge URBAN OUTFITTERS
Check out this jacket. It's, like, authentic punk shit. Urban Outfitters made one -- only one, and it hasn't been purchased yet. It's $375.

It's making people mad and sarcastic.

But those who think this jacket represents the apocalypse need to get over it, specifically those who think they're somehow guarding the Holy Grail of Punk Authenticity.

"No no, bro, you don't get it: my uncle had a Clash record and it was really important to me in high school in the '90s. I walked around in a Crass t-shirt 20 years after they broke up. After all, you know they never played this shit on the radio, unless you lived within 200 miles of a college or university."

You realize that you're complaining about the legitimacy of a company that has sold pre-assembled hoodies-in-blazers and sweaters with the thumbparts cut out to look like Kurt Cobain's?

And you're defending the punk legitimacy of at least two bands -- The Sex Pistols and The Clash -- who were quicker to sign their major label contracts than Kardashian scions?

What are the kids coming to these days? Nothing. They're coming to nothing.

If you really want to be punk rock, stick ice-picks into your eardrums or wear khakis with a blue blazer to a metal show. Better yet: have a homosexual orgy on something arbitrarily sacred in a place where authoritarians will arrest you for it and put you in prison for two years. That shit's punk as fuck.

See also: Is It Ok to Buy Records at Urban Outfitters?

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