Though we rarely go to "The Club," we're game for any heath and wellness company that hosts a party with an open bar shilling a drink created specifically for it. In this case it was "The Ferguson," a blend of lemon vodka, soda water and 2002's favorite schnapps, Apple Pucker, which was surprisingly not bad. Seeing as we didn't get a chance to speak with the Duchess, we had some time on our hands; as someone who rarely hits "The Club," here are our thoughts on it.5. There will always be some one-off celebrity sighting.
Real Housewives of Beverly Hills stars Adrienne Maloof and Paul Nassif were hanging out in the regular-folks' section of the club, Paul drinking a beer and Adrienne probably hiding a goblet of white wine somewhere. We should've realized anyone who lets Bravo film his colonoscopy would be happy to have his picture taken. Instead, we shot a little person dressed as a leprechaun.4. Bartenders are hot, in a plastic way.
There were only male bartenders at the downstairs bars. In another surprising turn, they were all very nice to us even though we weren't wearing sequined mini-dresses (we didn't get the memo). They were all attractive, in a Ken doll way. We tipped well.
She's drunk, loud and obnoxious from within her stall. This one was particularly amusing. Emerging, she brayed, "This is disgusting. I'm going to rent a room at the Beverly Hilton just to pee!" As she berated the bathroom attendant (what a shit job, literally) for the lack of toilet paper and was told it wasn't the attendant's fault, she suddenly backtracked and promised to leave a $25 tip. Uh-huh.