It's truly impossible to tally the changes the record industry has undergone in the past decade. But one thing is clear. The floodgates have been opened for no-talent assclowns seeking fame. Can someone please explain how Rebecca Black can really make waves with a song like "Friday"?
Well, actually, Rebecca Black is just a modern age LFO. And the only difference between the two is that rather than being cast off into viral-video infamy like Miss Black, back in 1999 these three Massachusetts boys with bad bleach jobs found themselves with a Top 5 hit in "Summer Girls" -- an absurd, moronic bubblegum pop song.
As such, we needed to take a closer look at the lyrics and see what these dudes knew about making hit records that apparently we were too blind to see.
Yeah ... I like it when the girls stop by ... in the summer
Do you remember, do you remember?
... when we met ...that summer??
The song starts off fairly simply. And we totally get where they are headed with this little ditty. We also like when girls drop by for the summer. Carry on, gents.
New Kids on the Block had a bunch of hits
Chinese food makes me sick
And I think it's fly when girls stop by for the summer, for the summer
Sure, New Kids on the Block did have a bunch of hits. And really, a heaping helping of Kung Pao Chicken often does require a side dose of Pepto Bismol for us as well. Things are starting to get confusing, though. How do these keen observations relate to girls dropping by for the summer?
I like girls that wear Abercrombie and Fitch
I'd take her if I had one wish
But she's been gone since that summer
Since that summer
Men in their mid-20s -- as LFO were at the time they recorded this song -- preying on Abercrombie and Fitch-wearing girls -- who tend to be in high school -- is just downright creepy.