"Bacon strips. Bacon strips. Bacon strips."
Uttered in clipped Canadian patois, as this trussed Frankenbeast is swaddled before entering the oven, these repeated words sound like a call to arms. In some sense, they are.
The Epic Meal Time dudes have garnered a dash of Internet fame dropping weekly YouTube videos chronicling their intestine-withering feats of culinary wickedness--like "The Massive Meat Log," a deep-fried loaf of beef, bacon, and cheese-stuffed hot dogs, and "The Angry French-Canadian (The Greasiest Sandwich Ever)," a palpitation-inducing preparation containing nine slices of bacon, three hot dogs, curds-and-gravy-soaked fries, a baguette loaf, a dozen eggs, maple syrup (because they're Canadian, we suppose), and over 207 grams of fat.
The above video takes the lard-injected cake, particularly on the heels of our most gluttonous holiday. Meet the TurBaconEpic Thanksgiving: A Dr. Pepper-and-butter-basted suckling pig stuffed with a turkey, stuffed with a duck, stuffed with a chicken, stuffed with a game hen, stuffed with a quail: all boned, every crevice and cavity shored up with croissant-bacon stuffing and something sausage-esque the narrators refer to as "meat gloop" and garnished with halved bacon-cheeseburgers.
Once the bronzed heap of meat emerges from the oven, the bros gather around to peel off sections and sip Grey Goose. "What's the point?" We can see one of their crusty fathers asking, taking a swig of Molson. "When are you going to do something with yourself, kid?"
Good taste might be the target of their weekly operations, but it's an easy one. In a November 24th Daily Mail article, one of the channel's founders responded, straight-faced, to the notion he and his boys might aim to offend: "We eat so you don't have to. We do this for fun."
And a million hits. We think they spend the other 26 days of each month nibbling acai berries and raw kale and running up stairs.