Ah, the joys of marketing junk food. Got some extra bits of dough at your mammoth fast food chain? Fry them up, dip them in frosting and hold a naming contest. Fiat revenue. On Monday Hardee's announced a new product, Biscuit Holes, and shortly thereafter a contest to name the cinnamon sugar-coated deep-fried circles of biscuit dough, which are sold with a plastic cup containing an icing dipping sauce. Apparently Biscuit Holes, which the company is calling a temporary name, is too obvious.
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Hardee's executive vice president for marketing Brad Haley has said that some of the company's own suggestions for naming the balls could not be repeated. (Imagine a job where you got to sit around a boardroom desk and name a donut hole.) So now it's time to ask the public. If we're going to eat this stuff for breakfast, we should by all means have naming rights. Hardee's has a website, www.NameOurHoles.com, where you can submit your suggestions for the biscuit holes (coupons!). This can also be accomplished, naturally, via Twitter or Facebook or YouTube. Thus my 8 year-old can upload her video before we head to the drive-thru. A downright pastoral 21st century morning.