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5 Processed Meat Products We Love to Hate (and Hate to Love)

1. Vienna Sausages

Vienna sausages: not exactly from Vienna.
Vienna sausages: not exactly from Vienna.
Derek Thomas

Vienna sausages are those pale mini-weenies that sort of look like sausages but don't really. They look more like lobbed-off fingers after a horrible Cuisinart accident. And they come in a can. Ensconced in gelatinous liquid. I used to wipe away the slime and pop these babies in my mouth whole when I was 10-- but I was 10, and it was 1977. Did I mention I was 10? What I'm trying to say is, do not eat these. Vienna sausages are not your friends. They are not even made in Vienna.

2. Oscar Mayer Bologna

Oscar Mayer is not a nice man.
Oscar Mayer is not a nice man.
Derek Thomas

Oscar Mayer may have a way with B-O-L-O-G-N-A, but he also has a product that spells nutritional disaster. What's in Oscar Mayer bologna, exactly? According to the label, a delightful mix of chicken, pork, water, corn syrup, sodium lactate, sodium phosphates, sodium diacetate, sodium erythorbate, sodium nitrate and, oh yes, salt. (There's also an ingredient simply called "flavor.") At least it doesn't have any partially hydrogenated vegetable oil. Yet.



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