Shaquille O'Neal

The Illuminati Is Real, and Other Shit My Students Taught Me

My school year is officially over. Last Thursday was the last day of school for the eighth graders in my science class. Teachers came on Friday to clean rooms and begin prep work for next fall and gossip about basically everyone who has a heartbeat (and, in some instances, even those without). Thi ... More >>

Best of Coachella: Weekend One

Karen O's Outfit Karen O's wardrobe on Friday night was bad ass. The Yeah Yeah Yeah's front woman appeared on the main stage in a technicolor cape draped over a suit that looked like it was made of mercury. The vibrant collage was topped with a headpiece that Liberace might have worn had he ever bee ... More >>

KDAY Is Closing? A Eulogy to the Best Station in L.A.

[Editor's note: Weekly scribe Jeff Weiss's column, "Bizarre Ride," normally appears on West Coast Sound every Wednesday. His archives are available here.] "Remember KDAY?" Tupac asked that question on "To Live & Die in LA," but the answer was obvious. Makaveli never even lived in Southern Califor ... More >>

This Is What It Feels Like In My Stomach Right Now

There is an evil inside of me. It is brooding and malevolent and vicious. It is absolute darkness. It is rotting my body on a cellular level. And it is there because I thought a bad idea (getting a burrito at the mall right before it closed) was a good idea ("HEY, LET'S GET A BURRITO FROM THE MALL B ... More >>

Scott Sterling Overdose Death In Malibu Prompts Coroner's Autopsy This Week

Scott Sterling, the 32-year-old son of controversial Clippers owner Donald T. Sterling, was found dead of an apparent overdose in Malibu last night, sheriff's officials said. Someone called and asked deputies to check up on Sterling at his beachside home last night, and when cops arrived about 11:3 ... More >>

Jason Alexander Serves Original SoupMan Samples Tomorrow at Pavilions

If one of your secret fantasies is to one day walk up to actor Jason Alexander and tell him that he can't have any soup, that day is almost here. Tomorrow, Alexander will be serving up soup samples from noon to 3:30 p.m. at Pavilions in Burbank. It's all part of a promotion for the nationwide launch ... More >>

5 Best Comedy Shows in L.A. This Week, Including Doug Stanhope

5. I Don't Know Dick Bob Wiltfong combs through love letters by some guy named Dick. The Improv, Sat., Dec. 1, 6 p.m.

Phil Jackson is Back at Lakers, 95 Percent Certainty, after Firing of Mike Brown: He'll Convince Kobe to Let Nash Have the Ball

By Paul Teetor Phil Jackson is back - unofficially, but with 95 percent certainty, pending a signed deal, etc. etc. This changes everything for the Lakers. How can simply replacing Coach Mike Brown with the Lord of the Rings make such a huge difference? Suddenly an LA Lakers vs. Miami Heat Final ... More >>

Mike Brown Fired by Lakers; Maybe Now Lakers Fans Will Stop Cyberbullying His Son, Elijah

Lakers management fired head coach Mike Brown today, just five games (and four losses) into the season. The LA Times is calling it the earliest firing in Laker history. On the bright side though, Brown is $11 million dollars richer, he doesn't have to deal with the team's notorious divas anymore ... More >>

We Write About More Than Bad Hipster Bands. No Seriously

The internet's stomach continues to churn over our Top 20 Worst Hipster Bands post, which -- as I noted in our "correction" -- inspired widespread anger and funny death threats involving oral sex from sharks. Someone even whined that it made him want to quit writing about music. Boo hoo! Folks too ... More >>

High Surf, Warm Water For Labor Day Weekend in L.A. Equals Danger

A perfect storm could be hitting Los Angeles today: Hot summer weather, warm Pacific Ocean temperatures and high surf could combine to create disaster. And all this during a holiday weekend. Hear us out: Even as things were expected to cool along the coast, the unrelenting heat inland will bring ... More >>

KDAY, the Gangsta Rap Oldies Station, Breaks New Ground by Playing Music From the Bad Old Days

KDAY's Tattoo Explains Why He Got a Forehead Tattoo That Says "I Slept With Shaq"

See also: KDAY, the Gangsta Rap Oldies Station, Breaks New Ground by Playing Music From the Bad Old Days Our big story this week is on L.A. radio station KDAY, one of the only terrestrial outlets in the country playing classic hip-hop. The station -- which is independent but gets great ratings -- c ... More >>

Top 10 Sexiest Hip-Hop Video Vixens

LMFAO 'Bikini Girl' Says She Was Fired For Being 'Big Boned' Top Ten Sexiest Album Covers We've Ever Seen Top 60 Worst Lil Wayne Lines on Tha Carter IV Top Ten Rap Albums For People Who Don't Know Shit About Hip-Hop Top 20 Greatest L.A. Rap Albums Of All Time: The Complete List Thoughts From A Rando ... More >>

Steve Nash's Secret Diet NBA Eating Habits

Yesterday came the news that the Lakers had landed future Hall of Fame point guard (and all-around amiable Canadian dude) Steve Nash from the Phoenix Suns in exchange for a boatload of future draft picks. Despite being 38 years old (the fifth oldest active player in the NBA), Nash last year had on ... More >>

Phil Collins' "In The Air Tonight": Why This Song Sucks

[Editor's note: Why This Song Sucks determines why particular tracks blow using science. It appears on West Coast Sound every Wednesday.] Song: Phil Collins' "In The Air Tonight" History: "In The Air Tonight" was the first single of the solo Phil Collins era. Lots of people know it. You (probably) ... More >>

Jerry West Doesn't Regret Baring His Soul in Biography West by West: My Charmed, Tormented Life

Reading West by West: My Charmed, Tormented Life is like overhearing a celebrity patient talking to his therapist: It's unsettling and uncomfortable -- yet you can't stop listening.Jerry West was a college All-American at West Virginia and an instant All-Star after he joined the L.A. Lakers in 1 ... More >>

Rick Ross and Busta Rhymes - Nokia Theatre - 1/13/12

Rick Ross feat. Busta Rhymes 1-13-12 Nokia Theatre See also: Fictional Cutting-Room Floor Outtakes From Rick Ross' Amazing GQ Profile Better than: Actually being Big Meech. Or Larry Hoover. At least in 2012. "Schindler and I are like peas in a pod! We're both factory owners, we both made shells f ... More >>

Rock Out with Your Lock-Out: Five Awful Athlete Songs

See also: Top Five Rapping Basketball Players Phil Jackson Might Actually Like If there's one thing most professional athletes are good at, it's sports. Unfortunately, the recent NBA lockout stemming from millionaires failing to come to terms with billionaires left many players with an unprecedente ... More >>

What's In Season at the Farmers Markets: Large California Chanterelles

Felicia FriesemaCantharellus californicus from Tutti Frutti Farms​Our early season rainstorms have yielded two predictable outcomes: angsty tweets from farmers market vendors trying desperately to keep self, customers and produce dry, and a splendid sprouting of mud puppies, a.k.a. California ... More >>

Top Five Rapping Basketball Players Phil Jackson Might Actually Like

​Phil Jackson, of all people, recently had some harsh words for "Fix The Knicks," the odd, showtuney-tune penned by New York Knicks owner James Dolan. (You can hear it here.) Dolan needs either "a better lyricist or a better musician," Jackson said. Ouch! Of course, it's hard to disagree with ... More >>

Shaquille O'Neal Sex Tape? Former Staffer Claims He Had It, Was Kidnapped by L.A. Gang on Search-and-Destroy Mission

Shaq.​This gets pretty complicated, so sit tight. But we will say: It involves Shaquille O'Neal allegedly having a sex tape he made with multiple women while married to Shaunie (though she could probably care less now), and allegedly having ties with a South L.A. gang called the Main Street Ma ... More >>

Lakers: Five Reasons L.A.'s NBA Dynasty Isn't Over Yet

The best player in the NBA is still with us.​The Lakers flamed out like Charlie Sheen in rehab -- in spectacular, unprecedented fashion (via a sweep the likes of which coach Phil Jackson has never seen). And now Phil Jackson says he's coached his last NBA game and Kobe Bryant is talking about ... More >>

Time's 140 Best Twitter Feeds: Marion Nestle, Michael Pollan, Harry Reid Lord Voldemort

If you only have 140 characters, they should be worth reading, no? Depends on whose Twitter feed you read. Time Magazine has just published a list (of course they did) of the top 140 Twitter feeds around the country. No, sorry, neither Charlie Sheen nor Kim Kardashian made it -- Neil Gaiman is #1, S ... More >>

Power Balance Admits Bracelets Don't Have Magical Powers; Lakers Still Superstitious

khloekardashian.celebuzz.comLamar Odom's better half says Power Balance "has taken him to a whole new level when he plays"​Laguna Niguel-based company Power Balance recently admitted to the Australian Competition and Consumer Commission that their wildly popular performance bracelets don't act ... More >>

Kobe Bryant, Drop This Turkish Airlines Deal Already

Kobe.​Not since a guy named Joseph Coors opposed Chicano studies classes at the University of Colorado, thus denying Coors beer a very thirsty Latino market for decades, has someone shot himself in the foot in such a d'oh way. Yeah, we're talking about you Kobe. We forgave you for that, er, s ... More >>

What Recession? SoCal's Richest People Measure Their Money In Billions

​Even though the recession allegedly ended in June, 2009, times are still tough. Soup is a staple. Souplantation a luxury. Soup kitchens -- a necessity. But the big wheels keep on turnin'. And the ballers, they keep on ballin'. Southern California's wealthiest people aren't at the tippy top of ... More >>

Top 6 Best Rap Songs by Athletes

Top 6 Best Rap Songs by Athletes

Shaquille O'Neal To Take On Rachael Ray, Joey Chestnut

AP Photo/Tony Dejak, FileShaquille O'Neal is hungry for Rachael Ray​Shaquille O'Neal's search for late-30s relevancy continues. After unsuccessful attempts to bring the Larry O'Brien Trophy to the championship-starved Phoenix Suns and Cleveland Cavaliers, the former Lakers MVP is currently a f ... More >>

The YaoMing Lips, Phoenix Sunn 0)))'s and Bon Iverson: #IndieRockBasketBall Rocks & Finger Rolls Twitter

The YaoMing Lips, Phoenix Sunn 0)))'s, and Bon Iverson: #IndieRockBasketBall

Top 10 Food-Related Onion Headlines

The Onion, for those that don't know, is a satirical newspaper reporting fake stories on a wide range of worldly topics -- and often the best part about reading those stories is the headlines. In fact, it's precisely why following them on Twitter is so much fun ("Online University Cracks Down On Row ... More >>

Lakers Are The Sports Franchise Of The Decade

Da Lakers.​Yes, another year-end, top-of-the-decade list, this time from Sports Illustrated. The magazine says the Los Angeles Lakers are the sports franchise of the decade. The Staples Center-based ballers beat out the NFL's New England Patriots (number two), the University of Connecticut's w ... More >>

This Unsporting Life: David Beckham's Plummeting Popularity

Wikipedia​The decline and fall of David Beckham, soccer superstar, can be glimpsed in the recent headlines below. The British midfielder's popularity began falling last spring when Beckham scuttled his contract with the L.A. Galaxy so that he could return to European team play. Los Angeles fans tu ... More >>

If the Lakers Were Rappers: A Study in Similitude

Prediction: If Kobe doesn't grow a mullet, the Lakers will take it in June. Kobe Bryant = Kanye West Raised in more affluent circumstances than their peers, Kobe and Kanye are not only among the best in their respective fields, they share a severe lack of humility and empathy. Mutually ol ... More >>

The 10 Rules of Pimpology According to the Video for Do or Die's "Po' Pimp"

10. The ability to acquire flaming pennies (these were also reportedly Shaquille O' Neal's last words upon leaving Orlando). Such magic coins will give their owners the ability to turn homeless people into suave and dapper, ladies men and thus realize their dreams of using P.I.M.P.O.L.O.G.Y. to lo ... More >>

Rolling With Big Boy

The voice of Power 106 What’s a few hundred pounds between friends?

9 Reasons To Get on the Clippers Bandwagon

How I Lost the War in Iraq

Sore Winners (and the Rest of Us) in George Bush’s America

57 Ways To Say Goodbye

Agent Provocateur

Pass the Paddles

Our guide to the games

Bend Over

Who is David Beckham, and why should I care?

The Lakers Lesson

Maybe the NFL wouldn't be the worst thing for L.A.

The Man Show

Letters

Character of the Happy Warrior

The education of Mark “Mad Dog” Madsen

Stage Rage

When losing it isn’t in the script

The Accidental Populist

Magic Johnson gives some back

Bold as Love

Jimi: Still raining, still dreaming