Santa Claus

Beyond Avenue Q

Christmas in Los Angeles: Why Do Our Xmas Lights Suck so Bad?

It's not always easy being a New York transplant in Los Angeles. I defend you a lot, LA, to everyone back home who hasn't eaten at your taco trucks, felt your gleaming afternoon sunshine or appreciated the sweeping vistas mid-hike through your urban mountains. But this holiday season I chose to stay ... More >>

UCLA Scientists Prove Angels Don't Exist

Dear Elijah: Pics or it didn't happen. Love, Science.​Consider the Christmas spirit officially crushed -- by a team of Bible-wary researchers from UCLA. They oversaw a recent study by the Out-Of-Body Experience Research Center in Los Angeles. Shockingly, of 30 volunteers taught to enter an ou ... More >>

Henry Rollins: The Column! The War On Christmas Starts With Me

​[Look for your weekly fix from the one and only Henry Rollins right here on West Coast Sound every Thursday, and come back tomorrow for the awesomely annotated playlist for his Saturday KCRW broadcast.] I am a veteran of the War on Christmas. It's been a few days now, and I am just emerging ... More >>

Market Research Mambo: Secrets of a Focus Group Aficionado

Buster Ringling isn't his real name -- but this really is his silhouette​ "If you're really strapped for cash, you can sell your blood plasma," Buster Ringling says. "You can become an extra, but $60 for eight hours' worth of work? You get treated literally like cattle. It wasn't for me." Whe ... More >>

Merry Contrarian Everyone

Buster Ringling isn't his real name -- but this really is his silhouette​ "If you're really strapped for cash, you can sell your blood plasma," Buster Ringling says. "You can become an extra, but $60 for eight hours' worth of work? You get treated literally like cattle. It wasn't for me." Whe ... More >>

A Tubular Christmas Story

Buster Ringling isn't his real name -- but this really is his silhouette​ "If you're really strapped for cash, you can sell your blood plasma," Buster Ringling says. "You can become an extra, but $60 for eight hours' worth of work? You get treated literally like cattle. It wasn't for me." Whe ... More >>

Top 5 Ridiculous But Awesome Christmas Shows In L.A.

​Need a break from all the credit card-maxing, house-lighting, bad party-attending and general seasonal stressing? Why not try something outside of the gift box this year? Here, five festive, somewhat freaky holiday haps in town that are anything but cookie-cutter Christmas confections. 5. Ch ... More >>

Top 5 Weekend Food Events: Boxing Match, Eat My Blog, Food of the Jews of France, Breakfast with Santa, Artisanal LA

It's a bake sale!​Boxing Match Boxed wine: scourge of snooty oenophiles, emblem of populist wine drinkers, re-embraced by thrifty contrarians. The stuff has, supposedly, improved by leaps and bounds since Trader Joe's cleverly repackaged the it in bottles and sold it as Two Buck Chuck. Decide ... More >>

Ryan Heffington's XXX-Mas Pageant at Cheetahs Hollywood with Performance Artists Actually Huizenga and Murphy Maxwell

Kelly McKayMerry XXX-Mas from Actually Huizenga​ I saw strippers blowing Santa Claus, under the dance pole Saturday night! Sir Ryan Heffington -- MOCA performer, TED talker, and choreographer of Ke$ha's "Take It Off" video -- curated an evening of dance, music and performance at Cheetahs Hol ... More >>

Arthur Christmas Review

Kelly McKayMerry XXX-Mas from Actually Huizenga​ I saw strippers blowing Santa Claus, under the dance pole Saturday night! Sir Ryan Heffington -- MOCA performer, TED talker, and choreographer of Ke$ha's "Take It Off" video -- curated an evening of dance, music and performance at Cheetahs Hol ... More >>

Swiss Cheese

Kelly McKayMerry XXX-Mas from Actually Huizenga​ I saw strippers blowing Santa Claus, under the dance pole Saturday night! Sir Ryan Heffington -- MOCA performer, TED talker, and choreographer of Ke$ha's "Take It Off" video -- curated an evening of dance, music and performance at Cheetahs Hol ... More >>

SLASH AWAY, SLASH AWAY, SLASH AWAY ALL

Kelly McKayMerry XXX-Mas from Actually Huizenga​ I saw strippers blowing Santa Claus, under the dance pole Saturday night! Sir Ryan Heffington -- MOCA performer, TED talker, and choreographer of Ke$ha's "Take It Off" video -- curated an evening of dance, music and performance at Cheetahs Hol ... More >>

GOD BLESS US EVERY RUM

Kelly McKayMerry XXX-Mas from Actually Huizenga​ I saw strippers blowing Santa Claus, under the dance pole Saturday night! Sir Ryan Heffington -- MOCA performer, TED talker, and choreographer of Ke$ha's "Take It Off" video -- curated an evening of dance, music and performance at Cheetahs Hol ... More >>

RARE EXPORTS: A CHRISTMAS TALE

Kelly McKayMerry XXX-Mas from Actually Huizenga​ I saw strippers blowing Santa Claus, under the dance pole Saturday night! Sir Ryan Heffington -- MOCA performer, TED talker, and choreographer of Ke$ha's "Take It Off" video -- curated an evening of dance, music and performance at Cheetahs Hol ... More >>

Taking the dick out of "dictionary" with 1988's The Nonsexist Word Finder

​Each Monday, your Crap Archivist brings you the finest in forgotten and bewildering crap culled from basements, thrift stores, estate sales and flea markets around Los Angeles. The Nonsexist Wordfinder: A Dictionary of Gender-Free Usage Author: Rosalie Maggio Date: 1989 Publisher: Beaco ... More >>

Ventura Roadtrip: A & F Country Market for Local Bee Pollen, Pickles and South Dakota Jam

J. GarbeeA & F Country Market​If you're trekking up the 101 to Ventura anytime soon for the last-of-summer surfing, fishing or general beach lounging, one of the best places to donate a few dollars to the local economy in thanks on your way out of town is at A & F Country Market, a roadside ma ... More >>

Download: 22 Songs of Shred and Doom from Hydra Head Records ft. Xasthur, Torche, more

Hydra Head phones it in​Santa Claus is known for being a carols-and-hymnals sort of fella, but once the summer equinox hits, he's all black cut-offs, devil horns and doom-metal. Why do you think he keeps that wicked beard? It's versatile. As far as gift-giving goes, this one may be arriving ... More >>

WHO'S YOUR GOLEM?

Hydra Head phones it in​Santa Claus is known for being a carols-and-hymnals sort of fella, but once the summer equinox hits, he's all black cut-offs, devil horns and doom-metal. Why do you think he keeps that wicked beard? It's versatile. As far as gift-giving goes, this one may be arriving ... More >>

Peace on Earth: Rare Marvin Gaye Xmas Song Still 100% Relevant

​Motown/Universal is commemorating the 2009 holidays with the double CD The Ultimate Motown Christmas Collection. UK's Mojo magazine has a very nice review of the album today. Thanks to the magic of digital downloads, you don't have to run to Sam Goody's or Tower (remember those days!) trying ... More >>

Over the Weekend: Superbad Spotting at the Echoplex, Plus Classic Goth and Santa Claus Pub Crawl

There were holiday parties galore this weekend, with events catering to indie rockers, goths and people who just want to dress like Santa Claus and hit a couple pubs. Keep reading to see what we did. Jay Oligny​ Club Underground vs. Hang the DJs Long-running indie clubs Underground and Hang t ... More >>

Curing Christmas Kleptomania

There were holiday parties galore this weekend, with events catering to indie rockers, goths and people who just want to dress like Santa Claus and hit a couple pubs. Keep reading to see what we did. Jay Oligny​ Club Underground vs. Hang the DJs Long-running indie clubs Underground and Hang t ... More >>

The North Pole Melts with R&B, Funk, Soul-Jazz, and Boogaloo on 'In the Christmas Groove' [MP3]

By Daniel Siwek ​Not everyone dreams of a white Christmas, if I have to hear Bing Crosby one more time I swear I'll make Dan Aykroyd in Trading Places look like Kris Kringle in the Miracle On 34th Street. Luckily Strut Records offers a surefire way to get some mistletoe smooching this yuletid ... More >>

AWAY IN A TUBA

By Daniel Siwek ​Not everyone dreams of a white Christmas, if I have to hear Bing Crosby one more time I swear I'll make Dan Aykroyd in Trading Places look like Kris Kringle in the Miracle On 34th Street. Luckily Strut Records offers a surefire way to get some mistletoe smooching this yuletid ... More >>

Mike Antonovich's Ironic Cross

Supervisor Mike Antonovich has rolled up his gray-flannelled trousers to wade deep into the culture wars. Specifically, according to the L.A. Daily News, he wants the crucifix put back in the County Seal, now that the steel cross has been restored to the roof of the San Gabriel Mission, following it ... More >>

Mass Murder Victim Funeral

More than 1,000 people attended the San Dimas funeral services for nine members of an extended Covina family murdered during a Christmas Eve rampage. On the night of December 24, Bruce Pardo, wearing a Santa Claus suit, arrived at the home of his divorced wife's parents and began a reign of violence ... More >>

Theater Reviews: Yo Ho Ho! A Pirate's Christmas, It's a Stevie Wonderful Life!

Also, Inspecting Carol and Groundlings Holiday Show

Last Night: Enlightened Debauchery with Mindshare LA @ The Lacy Lofts

The process of Googling has come to define New Millenial thinking - if you lack some piece of information you can just borrow it from someone else, a stranger with whom you now share a connection. This collaborative borrowing is the main thrust behind Mindshare LA, an event held every 3rd Thursday o ... More >>

Holiday Fever!

The process of Googling has come to define New Millenial thinking - if you lack some piece of information you can just borrow it from someone else, a stranger with whom you now share a connection. This collaborative borrowing is the main thrust behind Mindshare LA, an event held every 3rd Thursday o ... More >>

How to Survive the Holidays, Part 1

What to do Thanksgiving week

Neil Hanburger? I hate that guy!

What to do Thanksgiving week

Surfin' Fools

The Fifth Annual Doo Dah Surf Day

Thwack!

Fiction: New voices

Theater

Fiction: New voices

Theater Reviews

This week's pick, Beautiful City. Also The Chase Lounge, Jackson Frost and more

Film Reviews

Including this week's pick, Fur: An Imaginary Portrait of Diane Arbus

Film Reviews

Including this week's pick, Borat

Heady Metal, Britain's Favorite DJ, and a Defense of Americana's Best Killers

Including this week's pick, Borat

Animations

Including this week's pick, Borat

Storm the Arthouse

Some of the year’s best independent movies are still snaking their way toward L.A.; others may not come at all

Still Waters

I got 5 minutes. That's it. 5. To ask John Waters whatever I could. But you may have to wait for the LA Weekly "list issue" to read what he had to say, he gave me all kinds of advice, about man-o-pause, how to get over a heartache, and what grosses out the Prince of Puke himself. Stay tuned... I ... More >>

Christmas Music for People Who Like Music

I got 5 minutes. That's it. 5. To ask John Waters whatever I could. But you may have to wait for the LA Weekly "list issue" to read what he had to say, he gave me all kinds of advice, about man-o-pause, how to get over a heartache, and what grosses out the Prince of Puke himself. Stay tuned... I ... More >>

Materialistic Fetishism Reconsidered

(A last-minute gift-giving guide)

What Democracy Votes Like

Could a new way of voting save our system?

Rockie Horoscope

Could a new way of voting save our system?

Santa is a Wildman!

Jeffrey Vallance in The Land of Hoarfrost

Phallus Aforethought: Gender Bender

Jeffrey Vallance in The Land of Hoarfrost

Eloise

Almost first-grader, maker of birdhouses

Things That Mean Things

Almost first-grader, maker of birdhouses

Inside Orgasmatron

A closer look at the motor of joy