Why You Should Slut It Up For Halloween

Why You Should Slut It Up For Halloween

This week is Halloween! Hooray. And we all know what that means: Hordes of ladies walking around Hollywood in $500 outfits from Trashy Lingerie, stripper shoes and glitter all over their faces and décolletage. And ladies, our hats are off to you.

You should be slutting it up for Halloween.

Slutoween, as it's known in certain circles (OK, most circles), is decried by the occasional pearl-clutcher as being a product of "Girls Gone Wild" society, in which women are compelled to take our clothes off solely for the amusement of society. Many a derisive comment is regularly made towards ladies who choose to cavort about on All Hallow's Eve as a half-naked referee, or Pocahontas on her way out of the shower.

The concern is generally that if not for the external pressure, we'd prefer to be dressing as a Q-Tip, maybe, or a fully clothed ghost. But in truth, we're willing to bet that the majority of ladies who are planning on going out this week wearing only a bandana around their breasts and a g-string covering their assholes are doing it because they're curious to know how it feels.

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And here's the thing: That's OK. There's nothing wrong with wanting to explore your barely-clothed-in-public side. In fact, it's more than OK - it's positive.

Most days of the year find us all fully dressed, in keeping with appropriate attire for our lifestyle. If we work in an office, we get down with some business casual. If we're waitresses, maybe we have an apron that we slap on. And if we're writers...well, we stay in our pajamas until about 7:00 p.m. and then we change into clean ones and call it a night.

Because of that, we don't really know what it's like to walk around outside looking our sluttiest. Which is fine; we don't need to know how that feels all day, every day. But like any other kind of sexual experimentation, if you're inclined to try it, then try it you should.

And Halloween allows for relative safety when it comes to public sluttiness. First of all, you won't be the only one doing it, so you'll feel less self-conscious. Second of all, there's the physical safety aspect; if you want to walk around as a nearly-nude, do it on a night when the streets will be packed with other revelers. And third of all, it's generally socially acceptable; if you're feeling shy about wanting to go out in as few clothes as is legal on the streets of the U.S., it's the one night that you can simply point to the holiday and say, "it's Halloween's fault," like a pregnant lady eating her third Big Mac and blaming the baby.

So ladies, go ahead and slut it up this October 31. Get a group of friends together to join you. It's your night of hard-earned, bare-midriffed freedom.


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