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The Bachelor Finally Goes Minority, Hires Whitest Latino Ever

The Bachelor Finally Goes Minority, Hires Whitest Latino Ever
Juan Pablo via ABC

See also: Is the New Pope Latino?

We received some heated feedback when, in March, we questioned whether new Pope Francis I of Argentina is really Latino, since his blood appears to be purely European. Well, here we go again!

The Bachelor has been so white it might as well be called The Frat Boy. No bachelor (or Bachelorette) has been a minority that we can tell. Contestants of color rarely seem to make it past the first few roses, either, though a woman of mixed European and Filipino descent, Catherine Giudici, won The Bachelor in "season 17" earlier this year.

Well, ABC has finally come up with a solution to both your diversity concerns and its own clear desire to keep the show as ethnically pure as a Miley Cyrus birthday party:

They hired the whitest Latino ever to be the next bachelor. Yep. His name is Juan Pablo Galavis (a surname nearly unknown to these here Mexican parts of America), he was born in New York, his parents are Venezuelan, and he lives in Miami.

You couldn't be a lighter-skinned, more green-eyed, light-brown-hair-having Hispanic than Juan Pablo.

(Here's an activity for you: The next time you're in Miami strolling down Collins Avenue, shout "Juan Pablo" and see how many Caucasian-looking dudes from South America turn their heads).

The only thing that gives away Galavis' purported Latino-ness is his accent. His family moved back to Venezuela when he was about 2, and Spanish is his first language.

But you know who else speaks Spanish? The Spanish.

Alex Nogales, CEO of the National Hispanic Media Coalition, an organization dedicated to trying to get Hollywood to hire more Latinos, told the Weekly Juan Pablo's ascent is a step in the right direction, but we're not there yet.

He notes that most Latinos in the United States and Latin America are of mestizo or mixed origin, giving us at least some of that darker skin of our indigenous forebears:

We'll give them a pat on the back and say, 'Good going, but next time you do this, consider having a mestizo, because mestizos are the majority of Latinos throughout the Americas.'

When Hollywood goes Hispanic, he says, "They almost always go to the white ones."

Anyway, this is a brilliant move by ABC, one that will clearly endear the network to the legions of brown- and black-fearing viewers who tune in to the The Bachelor to see tall, gorgeous skinny people with perfect skin who happen to want to be actors.

For America, it's just like looking in a mirror.

Send feedback and tips to the author. Follow Dennis Romero on Twitter at @dennisjromero. Follow LA Weekly News on Twitter at @laweeklynews.