California, a global top 10 economy if it were a country, has problems. Unemployment, failing classrooms, and a multi-billion-dollar deficit. Important stuff.
But local state Sen. Ted Lieu knows what the real enemy is: Tanning. Because nobody likes a tan teen. So the fine legislator has introduced a bill that would prohibit those under 18 in the Golden State from getting a fake bake.
Cancer. And looks.
While kids already need their parents' signatures to get their tan on, Lieu says they can be forged. (No way).
But we like his frankly Asian-centric argument for making underage bakers outlaws. It's something a Korean mom might say to her daughter:
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"You will age doing this," he told the Wall Street Journal. "Your skin will look more leathery later on."
Really, Ted? You going to step away from budget negotiations to work on the urgent issue of skin aesthetics?
There's one surefire way for teens to rebel against Senor Lieu: It's called the beach. Get down there and protest, kids. Tune in, turn on, get leathery.