The LAPD is putting on a Super Bowl blitz this weekend, and if you think you're going to find a hole and complete a pass like Ben Roethlisberger, good luck with that.
The po-pos have two DUI checkpoints specifically to weed out football drunktards ... and they're planning a drunk-driver saturation patrol in the Valley on Super Bowl Sunday.
The good news? Like John Madden, we're putting the cops' strategy in ink doodles you can understand:
Huddle up, party people.
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Checkpoint numero uno happens tonight from 8 p.m. to 2 a.m. on Hollywood Boulevard at Gower Street in Hollywood (map).
Checkpoint numero dos happens Saturday from 8 p.m. to 2 a.m. at Ventura Boulevard and Tyrone Avenue in Sherman Oaks (map).
The Super Bowl Sunday "saturation patrol" happens Sunday from 3 p.m. to 11 p.m. in the North Hollywood and Van Nuys areas (cops will be patrolling and could be anywhere).
Don't be a loser.