Michael Kevin Lallana's Sperming Of Coworker's Bottle An 'Act Of Violence,' Court Rules
Remember the guy who ejaculated into a SoCal coworkers water bottle not once but twice?
Michael Kevin Lallana was convicted of misdemeanor battery and was ordered to serve a six-month sentence. That's old news. The issue here is that he appealed the ruling, questioning the concept of battery in regard to spiking someone's water with human protein.
As heinous as it sounds, his attorneys had a point:
There was no direct "battery" or touching involved. Yet late last week the Fourth District Court of Appeal in Santa Ana upheld the conviction, according to City News Service.
CSUN Womens Basketball vs. Uc Riverside Highlanders Womens Basketball
TicketsSat., Feb. 25, 4:00pm
Los Angeles Lakers v San Antonio Spurs - Verified Resale Tickets
TicketsSun., Feb. 26, 12:30pm
Los Angeles Clippers v Charlotte Hornets - Verified Resale Tickets
TicketsSun., Feb. 26, 6:30pm
Los Angeles Lakers v Charlotte Hornets - Verified Resale Tickets
TicketsTue., Feb. 28, 7:30pm
It's an interesting argument, and we now have to wonder if scatological frat-house pranks and spitting in one's hamburger now ranks as battery. (Or is there something transformative about this particular bodily fluid?).
The court might have set a precedent. Here's what it said:
The essence of the crime is an unconsented, offensive, physical contact. In addition, that offensive contact between the aggressor and the victim need not be direct, but rather 'Can be done indirectly by causing an object to touch the other person.''
The judges added that Lallana's actions constituted "use of force or violence."
We're guessing then, that spit really is a weapon.
Get the ICYMI: Today's Top Stories Newsletter Our daily newsletter delivers quick clicks to keep you in the know
Catch up on the day's news and stay informed with our daily digest of the most popular news, music, food and arts stories in Los Angeles, delivered to your inbox Monday through Friday.