In a city with the worst traffic in the nation, cops are known sit on street corners and collect money via b.s. ticket traps. In a town with some of the most torn-up roads in the nation, the City Council's proposed solution was to raise property taxes. City Hall has had issues with building inspectors taking bribes and workers drinking on the job.
But in the City Council's rosy view of its peasantry, the real issues are far more Portlandia than pothole. After all, this is a body that once outlawed cat declawing and took a dim view of retail pet sales. All well and good if we didn't have real problems:
The latest council campaign?
Bicycle parking. Yes, parking for your bike. Issue numero uno.
The council wasted little time yesterday in unanimously approving an ordinance that will require new developments, including apartment buildings and condo complexes, to increase spaces for your two-wheeled ride.
The new law will head to Mayor Antonio Villaraigosa for his signature.
Well, maybe. Anyone who has lived in such a building in the city knows that parking is minimal as-is.
This law says that developers can replace up to 30 percent of their vehicle spots with bicycle spots, with parking for four bikes equaling one car space.
Even newly approved restaurants and bars will be required to install bike spots at a rate of 1 for every 2,000 square feet of space they inhabit.
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SHOW ME HOW
In some cases "long-term" bicycle garages and even on-site shower facilities will be required by the city.
We're not necessarily against all this. We just wish the council would do the hard work first and tackle this pie-in-the-sky Portlandia stuff after our streets stop crumbling.
After all, you might end up with a really nice place to park your bicycle ... after it's been bent all to hell from the crappy roads in L.A.