5 Instagram Shots That Have to Stop
They called the baby boomers the Me Generation. But social media and photo-blasting sites like Instagram have given a whole new meaning to narcissism, or at least to the term "sharing is caring."
Millennials' lives are all out there for the public to see. We know when you get a haircut and a new pair of shoes. We've seen your boyfriend and your dog — 1,000 times.
But is it too much information? Sometimes, yes. And sometimes we're just sick of looking at all your photos. Here are five shots we are downright sick of seeing on your Instagram.
5. Girls kissing. Popular on Instagram, the "girls kissing" shot is often accompanied by a young man in the frame pointing victoriously, like Rick Ross pointing at ass. As if he just won the lottery. Woo-hoo. Except that we all know it's a tease of the cruelest kind. These young women are really not that freaky. Stop playin.'
If you are Jason Neroni, the chef at Superba Snack Bar, you are allowed to photograph your beautiful creations. If not, and you're just the one doing the eating, please stop.
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4. Food. This one is pretty tired. We know you have a beautifully presented plate by chef Ludo Lefebvre or whoever else you're worshiping tonight as half the world starves. And yes, that well-arranged entree looks gorgeous.
But you're so special because you eat? Stop fronting and stuff your face. Taking pictures is for tourists.
See also: Top 10 L.A. Chefs to Follow on Instagram
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3. Gym shots. This is usually a case of male vanity gone wild. Too much testosterone can make a guy believe that others like to look at him as much as he likes to look at himself. And that's rarely the case — unless you're Bradley Cooper.
There are many things guys don't get about girls, and this is chief among them: Women simply don't enjoy the visual as much as men do because your man parts, no matter how well sculpted, are comparatively disgusting (again, unless you're Bradley Cooper). They're why clothing was invented. Besides, if you're actually pretty enough to look at with your shirt off, you're probably gay (or Bradley Cooper).
2. Nails. Dear ladies: Guys might be slobs, but we really do try things to grab your attention, from the occasional haircut to getting our rides detailed. Some of this stuff, like getting a new set of wheels, can be quite expensive. Do you even notice? Of course not. But god forbid you get a $15 manicure without the entire globe sitting up and taking notice. Ditto when it comes to new shoes, clothing, and accessories that can be plastered on Instagram or Pinterest. And does every one of you have to make like a cougar clawing and snap a shot of your new French mani? It's a little too vain, even for you.
And the Instagram shot we most love to hate is ...
1. Instabrags. This selfie afflicts both men and women equally. You're showing off your dog, a new bicycle, or maybe even a dashboard temperature gauge (phew, it's hot!). But in the background you can clearly see the Mercedes, BMW or Audi your mom just bought you (or maybe it is your dad's — or your neighbor's).
Yes, we're aware you just can't drive 55 and thus must show us your speedometer in a shot that also includes the logo of your fine ride. Your bid to cloak your materialism as a public service announcement is fully transparent. Your friends are not green with envy. They want to puke at your crass lack of class. Those who really have it don't flaunt it this hard. Try to restrain yourself.
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