Worst of Coachella 2015, Weekend Two

Somewhere out there, somebody is having a bad timeEXPAND
Somewhere out there, somebody is having a bad time
Photo by Willie T

We love you, Coachella, but sometimes you bring us down. Here were the biggest bummers of weekend two.

The Lack of Enthusiasm at the Entrance

Walking into the venue around 2 p.m. on Friday, Coachella staffers were attempting to engage with the strings of attendees filtering through the security gates. But the staff's exuberant cries of ,“What’s up, Coachella!” were met with awkward half-laughs and eye rolls, and not a single flower-crowned party girl or fanny-packed festival-goer could muster a response. Granted, it’s blistering under the Indio midday sun, but a little reciprocation and enthusiasm would be nice. Props to the staffers who were more excited to be there than the actual ticket holders. — Heidi Darby

We get it... you're here together
We get it... you're here together
Photo by Chris Victorio

Coordinated Outfits

It’s been an ongoing trend for the past few years, but at this year’s event it went too far. From amateur basketball teams to groups of people wearing shirts that would be better at a family reunion to the Bill Murray people, the coordinated outfits may have hit their extreme this year. At a festival where most people pride themselves on uniqueness and trendsetting, coordinating outfits say, “Hey, look at me and my conformist friends.” We hope this trend stops sometime soon. — Daniel Kohn

The Highlight of Your Day?

Weekend revelers filled the grass in front of the Coachella stage on Friday night, relaxing and grooving to indie rockers The War On Drugs. The sun was slipping behind the mountains, fans were swaying, and all seemed right with the world. A trio of hazy-eyed twenty-somethings overlapped one another on nearby blanket, chatting and giggling without a care in the world. The three women would pause from conversation every so often, wiggling their hips or outstretching their arms in applause. It was nearly impossible not to admire their apparent bonding moment, until… one of the young ladies sat up, and looked down at her blissed-out companion and asked, “So what was the highlight of your day?” Her friend responded, “Getting a selfie with the girl from The Bachelor!” Wow. When snapping a selfie with a D-list celebrity is the highlight of your day at Coachella, you’re officially doing it wrong. — Heidi Darby

Is documenting your every move really that important?
Is documenting your every move really that important?
Photo by Daniel Kohn

Selfie Sticks

Coachella shouldn't have to ban selfie sticks. Really, no festival or concert venue should find it necessary to institute such an inane rule. People should know not to bring them. Still, despite this year’s ban, festival-goers managed to sneak them in (hopefully by inserting them deep inside a nether orifice). There was rarely a show where several weren't hoisted in the air. Each time, they blocked parts of the stage and distracted from the performances. To the rebels who brought them, we sympathize with your need to flex on SnapChat. However, there are far less obtrusive methods of broadcasting your Coachella experience to other (LED) lit and geotagged humans. In the future, please consider watching the performances you paid to see instead of recording yourself watching them. — Max Bell

Barefoot People

How filthy and gross do you have to be to act totally cool with walking around Coachella without shoes on? Flip-flops are questionable, but they're better than nothing. Maybe the barefoot crowd spent so much buying their Coachella outfit that they couldn't afford shoes to go with it? Regardless, no one wants to see people's blackened feet stomping around the festival, and let's not even consider what they might've stepped in over the course of the weekend. — Josh Chesler

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Toilet Paper Throwers

Why throw a huge roll of TP accross the crowd to hit a random stranger on the head when you could be throwing water bottles like a normal person? Seriously, guys. You TP the houses of shitty teachers in '70s and '80s sitcoms, not people at a music festival. — Paul T. Bradley

Leaving the Day Parking Lot

Everyone who leaves the day parking lots is forced to drive through a narrow makeshift road of cones. Even if you haven't touched a lick of alcohol (or any other substances), driving through after a long day of festival-ing and trying not to knock any over while a horde of cops watches you is extremely nerve-wracking. — Sarah Purkrabek


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