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Will The Real Joaquin Phoenix Stand Up? New Rhymes for (or from?) a Budding Rapper

Recently two comment posts have appeared as part of our Joaquin Phoenix Attempts a 'Reverse Will Smith' coverage, and we've been very impressed. In fact, we're kinda wondering whether MC Joaquin isn't floating us a few rhymes to see how they play in the real world. You be the judge:

comment #1, from mcerock:

My name is Joaquin

I'm on da scene.

Scratchin' out rhymes

stored up in my bean.

Casey in my face

tryin' to chase

my creativity

up in this place.

Y'all gonna choke

when u see it's a joke

just to promote.

That's all, he wrote.

Peace.

The second entry is from someone named Joaquin Phoenix. Is it real? You be the judge.

My name is Joaquin

threw ma career in the bin

i got a stitch lip

its like the the mouth version of the sty

im the white version of t.i

and thats why.......

i walk the line

hollywood denied me my oscar but thats fine

no point cry'n

solve me my problems with 4 bottles of wine

i guess its time.....

Maybe the Real Joaquin trying out his rhymes on an unsuspecting public? Then there's this one, which was channeled into my head a few minutes ago, I'm pretty sure from Joaquin himself:

Phoenix rising, sweat pants falling

MC Joaquin, done with stalling

Screenplays are for fakers

Rap for moneymakers

Celebrities? Necessities!

Can I see your titties?

Lift up your shirt, pull down your bra

while Casey Affleck films it on the camera

Perhaps we can help Joaquin write his album for him?

UPDATE: This one just arrived from wicked_good:

shot eminem and stole his album the relapse

scribble over the title and add in some real raps

i hate you cristian bale stole all my roles

you russell brad and tom all have no souls

well goodnight goodbye cya sarinaro

today you still cant pronounce my name

and ye wont be able to tomorrow

got me some gold teeth a ps3 and some coolaid

im growin a goatee and gettin me a ball fade


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