Hey Hipster Hater! Here's the Only 2010 Sunset Junction Street Fair Survival Guide You Need
Don't try this at home... or on the streets of Silver Lake.
[FOR UPDATES ON SUNSET JUNCTION STREET FAIR 2010, including band lineups CLICK HERE]
It's here people, the big Summer weekend event you sooo don't care about and keep telling everyone you're not attending because:
a) "Silver Lake is full of hipsters!"
b) "It's too expensive." (Never mind that you regularly shell out the same 20 smackers for one buzz band at The Music Box/El Rey and SJ has dozens.)
d) "Silver Lake is full of hipsters." (Could never repeat this as much as we hear it!)
But in the event that you happen to find yourself at this year's Sunset Junction Street Fest, because your friend got you a ticket or you know a band playing or something (you're too cool to actually pay --even though part of it goes to helping area youth-- of course!), we offer you this handy little survival guide.
Packing sunscreen, water and money goes without sayin,' so we wont. What we do offer here are some tips and quips to help you navigate the two day street fest like a boho pro.
We've done the legwork and now all you have to do is work your own legs... in 80 degree heat... for blocks and blocks ... after you find parking. Have fun, suckas. We will (with or without you)!
-- First and foremost, if you plan to try anything sneaky to get in, know that they're ready for you... with cuffs (and not at Rough Trade)-->
--SJ Trippers: heat, crowds, kids and nauseating aromas are great when you're high. (Druggies= Dummies).
--Flirt with the Hells Angels-ish carny operators for extra ride time. Don't be surprised if they want to ride you later.
--Wear sunglasses (even at night) not to look cool, but to avoid eye contact with all ex-BFs and frenemies.
--Drag queens, leather daddies and costumed freaks- don't stay away! We love you and you are what SJ is all about in so many ways, but babes for your own good, don't wear too much regalia during the day. Makeup and PVC melt!
-- Why is velvet rope club mogul Brent Bolthouse deejaying this thing? Who knows, but don't be surprised if you see Paris and Nicky Hilton cut in front of you in line for the Tilt-O-Whirl.
-- Remember strollers aren't just for mamas. They're great for hiding hooch. Coolers on wheels!
-- Statement tees are a staple at every Street Fair. This year is sure to be no exception. Suggestions: "I'm with stupid-→," "Obama- Still Hoping," "Free American Apparel."
Flying high at Sunset Junction in '09.
-- Spending $25 in a carny game booth to win your kid (or crush) that ugly stuffed animal is totally worth it.
-- Vendors fees, schmender fees... Got something to sell? Just roll a rack around rogue-style like these ladies did to hawk their wings last year-->
-- Don't wear these wings. They're so last year!
The Silver Lake "$5 guy."
Marc Abrams gone, he is the de facto mascot of Silver Lake (if you don't recognize him, you must live on the Westside)... and he's not a hipster.
The Sunset Junction Street Fair takes place at 3700 to 4300 Sunset Boulevard (between Edgecliffe Dr and Fountain Av) and
4000 to 4200 Santa Monica Boulevard (between Sanborn Ave and Hoover St). Sat., Aug. 21 (11am to 11pm) and Sunday, Aug. 22 (11am to 10pm).
Tickets available on-line for $15; $20 at the gates. 12 and under/65 and older are free. Click here for line-up and schedule info.
Read Falling James' take on the music line-up here.
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