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Best XXX Activities in L.A.

Our Best Of L.A. issue is out. Let's party!

Or let's take our clothes off. At the very least, let's watch someone else take their clothes off, or buy some accessories for the next time we feel like taking our clothes off.

On that note, these are the best strip club, bachelorette party activity, adult store, and more.

See also: Best L.A. Musicians By Genre

Best XXX Activities in L.A.
flickr/ivang

Best Strip Club: The Gold Diggers

Yes, The Gold Diggers is a dank, black cave with well drinks that will set your mouth on fire and a beer selection that is bested by 7-Eleven. It's also cash-only, and for a spell its sound system was a boom box. But hear us out: All your favorite dives -- including Jumbo's and the Frolic Room -- have been taken over by faux-Hawks and Velcro high-tops, right? Unless you're a local at the Monte Carlo in Koreatown, it's hard to find true grit in this town anymore. What better way to slum it, then, by patronizing a place featuring multi-ethnic girls of various shapes and sizes dancing in bikinis for pretty much no one as you watch the Dodgers on the hanging TV? There's no cover. There's no parking. And the cops are at the residential hotel next door (site of the manhunt for the killer of Hollywood publicist Ronni Chasen in 2010), like, every other day. Perfect. 5632 Santa Monica Blvd., Hlywd. facebook.com/golddiggershollywood. --Dennis Romero

Best Place for a Bachelorette Party: Artworks Studios' Drawing Parties

Did Magic Mike ruin the allure of a trip to a strip club, ladies? Is a dance club too ordinary, expensive or crowded? A day at the spa too tame? Then how about donning those pink boas and glowing penis hats for a bachelorette party where you might actually learn something? Starting at about $75 per person, the Artworks Studios' Drawing Parties bring out the naked guys -- or girls -- and some snacks while pairing you with an easel and art supplies for a night of charcoal sketching classes. (A deluxe version runs around $125 each and includes dinner and Champagne.) Was your plus-one curious about your finished project? "Date Night" Drawing Parties with two models also are available. 660 N. Larchmont Blvd., Larchmont. (323) 463-2562, drawingparty.com. 
--Whitney Friedlander

See also: The Best of Los Angeles 2013

Best Adult Store: Pure Delish

If your idea of an adult shop is a shame-inducing hole-in-the-wall with sticky magazines, XXX video booths filled with men on the sex-offender list, and leather accessories worthy of a farm, Pure Delish probably isn't the place for you. It has no videos and no magazines, but, taking a page from Hustler Hollywood, that mall-like boutique for smut and unmentionables on the Sunset Strip, it has lingerie, shoes, lube, condoms and toys. The women who work there dress in candy-striper outfits, which is nice. But here's the thing: Most of the customers are female. The sales staff will happily, without much blushing or giggling, demonstrate the latest in battery-operated technology, too. And the prices are good. Not that we'd know. 10746 Washington Blvd., Culver City. (310) 591-8792, puredelish.com. --Dennis Romero

Bonus: These next two aren't triple-X, per se, but they're sure to get you revved up!

Lucha VaVoom
Lucha VaVoom
Timothy Norris

Best Burlesque Show: Lucha VaVoom

When it comes to the biggest bang/bump/grind/headlock for your buck, Lucha VaVoom at the Mayan is the winner and still champion. It's the biggest burlesque-themed spectacle that takes place in Los Angeles on a regular basis (usually on holidays such as Valentine's Day, Halloween and, of course, Cinco de Mayo) and the ladies involved are pros when it comes to pinup style. VaVoom is truly two great tastes that taste great together: the excitement of masked Mexican wrestling and the enticement of old-fashioned striptease with a rockin' flair, plus a wry comedic tone via the show's announcers. Led by Rita D'Albert (aka Ursulina) -- who co-created the Velvet Hammer troupe along with Michelle Carr -- Lucha VaVoom often features Velvet Hammer alums, and these ladies more than hold their own next to the masked mayhem that goes on in the ring. 1038 S. Hill St., dwntwn. (213) 746-4674, luchavavoom.com. --Lina Lecaro

See also: The Best of Los Angeles 2013

Club Fais Do-Do
Club Fais Do-Do

Best Club for Burlesque Parody: Café Club Fais Do-Do

Drive down this shabby and otherwise forgettable stretch of West Adams Boulevard on a Friday night and you might find a mob of boisterous fans wearing sexy wizard costumes in a line that stretches halfway down the block. The occasion? Harry Potter-themed burlesque, just one of the dozens of pop culture-inspired parody shows that packed Café Club Fais Do-Do's art deco ballroom this year. Built as a bank in the 1930s and later revived as an underground jazz club in the 1960s, the beloved venue has previously been cited in our Best of L.A. issue for both its comedy and storytelling shows. But its Peepshow Menagerie-produced burlesque parodies -- with themes ranging from voluptuous Disney villains to scantily clad sci-fi Martians -- really take the cake, proving that women of all shapes and sizes can be absurdly funny and campy while bursting through a papier-mâché spaceship wearing nothing but pasties and Martian antennae. 5253-5257 W. Adams Blvd., West Adams. (323) 931-4636, faisdodo.com. --Jennifer Swann

See also: Best L.A. Musicians By Genre

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