You Say You Want a Resolution

Professional slob Merrill Markoe. See Friday.

FRIDAY, March 10

Broken any New Year’s resolutions yet? Same here. ?Un-Cabaret’s Say the Wordseries continues with the theme “The New Me,” featuring people funnier than your friends reading personal essays about fresh starts. Host Beth Lapides will share her tale about getting evicted and moving to Palm Springs. Scott King reveals how he was fired from his bigtime TV job and also headed to the desert, and Merrill Markoe has a new piece about trying to get her messiness under control. As of press time, nobody knows what Alan Zweibel will be reading, but it probably has to do with procrastination. Wait — this just in from Mr. Zweibel: “I will be speaking about my grandfather. Or maybe my car. Or Perry Como. I hope this helps you.” Skirball Cultural Center, 2701 N. Sepulveda Blvd.; Fri., March 10, 8 p.m.; $15. (866) 468-3399 or

SATURDAY, March 11

When hot rods and rad cartoons come together, it’s called “kustom kulture,” one of those krazy kult kicks people get way too into. Fortunately, even if you don’t have a ’50s hairdo and a Biker Betty tattoo, you can still attend California Screamin’: Art & Hot Rod Show.The exhibit kicks off with a display of custom cars, followed by a bash at the Purple Orchid Tiki Lounge with appropriately loud bands. The artist known as “The Pizz” will sign his new book, as well as his limited-edition silk-screen poster, created just for the event. Gasoline, 423 Main St., El Segundo; Sat., March 11, 5-10 p.m.; after-party till 2 a.m. at Purple Orchid. (310) 416-9188.

SUNDAY, March 12

It’s a long way to ol’ Pomona. It’s a long way to go. It’s a long way to ol’ Pomona. To the Fourth Annual Los Angeles County Irish Fair & Music Festival. Goodbye three-one-oh-oh. Farewell three-two-three. It’s a long way to ol’ Pomona. But nine-oh-nine’s calling me. If traffic allows. Fairplex, 1101 W. McKinley Ave., Pomona; Sat.-Sun., March 11-12, 10 a.m.-6 p.m.; $16, $12 seniors & students. (909) 623-3111.

MONDAY, March 13

While the Sex Pistols don’t attend their induction into the Rock & Roll Hall of Fame in New York, you can support their protest by attending the Largo Comedy Show, which this week features Nick Swardson and Friends, including Howard Kremer and Brent Weinbach. Largo, 432 N. Fairfax Ave.; Mon., March 13, 8 p.m.; $5. (323) 852-1053.

TUESDAY, March 14

Where were you in 1986? If you were hip — and of course, you were — you definitely went to see director Dave Markey’s L.A. post-punk, Super-8 flick Lovedolls Superstar. Hell, you were probably in the film.In case you weren’t hip, or were in infancy in 1986, Lovedolls Superstar is the follow-up to the even crappier, post-punk Super-8 flick Desperate Teenage Lovedolls. As a film, Lovedolls Superstar is no Yentl, but the music — by Sonic Youth, Meat Puppets, Dead Kennedys, Black Flag and Redd Kross — rocks. We’re telling you all this because it’s out on DVD today in a special package titled Lovedolls Superstar Fully Realized, with commentary by Markey and stars Jennifer Schwartz, Jeff McDonald and Steven McDonald, plus outtakes and deleted scenes.


Are comics funnier when they’re circumcised or uncircumcised? UCLA’s Department of Humor Research (Foreskin Division) presents the second annual British/Irish Comedy Invasion. The festival kicks off tonight with Tommy Tiernan in his standup show Loose. Tiernan’s a cute man with a thick, but not too thick, Irish accent. His humor is accessible and a little wacky and just slightly hard to understand. Example? He describes free jazz as sounding like “a fire in a pet shop.” UCLA, Royce Hall, Westwood; Wed.-Wed., March 15-22, 8 p.m. (Sun., 7 p.m.); $20 & $25 (Fri.-Sat.). (310) 825-2101.

THURSDAY, March 16

American Cinematheque’s Alternative Screen (meaning, “We’re low-budget and hip and we’re proud but we’d gladly sell out to Hollywood so please love us”) gets everybody ready for next weekend’s big L.A. bike marathon with a screening of B.I.K.E.,a documentary about the Black Label Bicycle Club and its arty, rowdy antics in such cities as Minneapolis, New York, London, Paris and Amsterdam. Here in Hollywood, we get the movie instead. The filmmakers will be on hand after the screening. Also screening is the short Dragon. Egyptian Theater, 6712 Hollywood Blvd., Hollywood; Thurs., March 16, 7:30 p.m.; $9. (323) 466-FILM.


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