There is a horrible injustice in this here so-called land of the free, and it requires your immediate, undivided attention.
Yes, we're talking about top inequality. We live in a world where men, some of them quite unattractive, are able to expose us to their manboobs and yet women, some of them quite attractive, have to deny their mammaries their constitutional right to free speech:
Well, six years ago the group GoTopless.org debuted to bring attention to this heinous violation of democratic principles.
And like the protesters throughout our nation's glorious history, this particular movement puts its beliefs into action each summer with Go Topless Day, which will happen in Venice on August 25 (that's a Sunday in case some of you patriots need to get your camera gear prepared).
The founder of the group, Claude "Rael" Vorilhon, says:
As long as men are allowed to be topless in public, women should have the same constitutional right. Or else, men should have to wear something to hide their chests.
And so, if you go, and we know you will, you'll see men wearing bikini tops, which isn't half as politically compelling as seeing women express their own beliefs.
While the group lists California as a state with "top freedom," the city of L.A. doesn't always tolerate this particular form of equal expression, apparently.
And so some participants will also be wearing tape. Which is better than something.
All the magic happens from 2 p.m. to 5 p.m. on Ocean Front Walk, starting at Navy Street. Info.