Models & Bottles: 5 Lessons From the Roll Models Reality Show

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Fri, Jul 12, 2013 at 8:10 AM
click to enlarge LOUD / FACEBOOK
  • LOUD / Facebook

See also: Koreatown: America's Hippest Neighborhood.

After tossing around the idea of doing a story about the latest reality show, Roll Models, from the producers of K-Town, our colleagues couldn't seem to find anything redeeming about this YouTube series on SoCal import car show girls and go-go dancers.

Nonsense. If the Real Housewives franchise can focus on vacuous, mostly white women and their ugly retail priorities, why can't we have a series about mostly Asian American girls and their beautifully vacant, half-dressed world? In fact, after watching the first two episodes of Roll Models (episode 2 just dropped yesterday), we learned some valuable lessons, for both guys and girls, that you can use for navigating contemporary nightlife.

(Warning: NSFW material):

5. Even though this show is about so-called car show "import models," being a car-show import model is the lowest form of model you can be. Just ask Gina Darling, who informs us in episode 1 that she's a "model model:"

Nowadays if you have tits and ass and a halfway decent face and you bend over in front of a car all of a sudden you're a model.

4. Hot girls will let you buy them a drink when you're at a club. Just don't expect them to stick around. This is part of a strategy, it would seem, to get drunk on someone else's dime. This is surprising to no one, of course, but it's interesting to see attractive women admit it on camera. In episode 2 Michelle Yee explains that, after you have procured said overpriced cocktail, you must "stick around for a few minutes and say, 'Thanks so much.'"

  • Gina Darling via LOUD / Facebook

3. No tipping allowed. Even though go-go dancers at clubs do "booty shaking," "hair flipping" and of course, making "that ass clap," as we learn in episode 2, one does not, we repeat not, tip them by placing currency near well-groomed areas barely covered by their undergarments. "You don't put $100-dollar bills in go-go dancers thongs," says Michelle Yee.

  • Scarlet Chan, top, via LOUD / Facebook

2. Go-go dancers are not strippers, but they're close. Scarlet Chan, a former nude dancer who's trying to transition to go-going, as they call it, analyzes the situation in episode 1 and concludes that both disciplines are in the same "realm:" "You guys are shaking your ass on stage for money," she says. However, this offends the very kinetic Nikita Esco, who says:

It really pisses me off when people say go-go dancing and stripping is the same thing.

So, if you want to compliment a go-go dancer at a club, you probably shouldn't say that.

And, perhaps the most important nightlife lesson we learned from watching Roll Models ...

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