While we should be debating about whether the Academy is too white or whether a French director really is the best Hollywood had to offer last year, what we'll inevitably end up talking about this morning is this:
Did Jennifer Lopez expose her nipple to a worldwide audience at the Oscars last night?
It's question numero uno after Lopez and Cameron Diaz presented awards for Best Makeup and Best Costume Design:
The she-did-it theorists will point to a darker, circular formation possibly peeking from the left inner top of her Zuhair Murad dress: Areola! At the least.
But defenders argue that that these kinds of dresses come with double-sided tape, sometimes with pasties included as part of the costume. And, no, we're not at a strip club as we write this.
Perhaps America's imagination was coloring in all the good parts.
JLosNipple took to Twitter last night and took credit for the slip.
We still don't believe it.
In fact, Lopez's stylist, Mariel Haenn, heads in this direction when she tells Entertainment Weekly:
The Oscar dress was custom made for Jennifer by designer Zuhair Murad. The dress fit perfectly to her every inch. There were cups built in and there's no chance that there were any how do you say? 'Slips.'
Yeah, we're pretty sure there was glue involved.
And what the hell were you doing squinting at the few megapixels making up the possible outer regions of J.Lo's nipplage anyway?