Answers to Nothing Review
Panicked over being late to artificially inseminate his wife at the hospital, an unhappily married therapist (Dane Cook) pulls his mistress' mouth off his cock and forces her to spit into a plastic donation cup. So begins this wretchedly unearned provocation of a drama, in which co-writer/director Matthew Leutwyler rips off Paul Haggis wholesale with another goddamn interwoven ensemble of disparate, desperate Angelinos crashing into one another. A recovering drunk (Miranda Bailey) seeks redemption for paralyzing her marathon-running bro, an African American TV writer admits to her suitor (and our philandering shrink) that she loathes black people, and a milquetoast schoolteacher (Mark Kelly) obsesses about both fantasy gaming and the little girl whose recent kidnapping serves as a media-frenzy backdrop. (To add to the laughable sensationalism, the primary suspect flirts with the lead detective during interrogations.) Nudging past two lengthy hours, Answers to Nothing also answers to nobody, oblivious to how far-fetched and emotionally fraudulent its lost-soul crises are. Ponderous monologues about bad choices and heartbreak epitomize the formulaic screenwriting, but it's the crosscutting between a vigilante's bloody confrontation and an angsty rock show for climactic tension that makes this movie the most embarrassing project on co-star Barbara Hershey's resume. (AMC Century City 15)
Get the Film Club Newsletter
Stay up to date on the best new movies with our critics' latest reviews, interviews and trailers for the films coming to a theater near you each week.
More Film News
- I Never Liked the National Lampoon's Vacation Series, and This New Version Is...
- Five Reasons to Enter the Silly, Sad World of Netflix's BoJack Horseman
- You Will Learn Exactly Three New Things From the Chris Farley Documentary
- Jason Segel Had His Book Club Read Infinite Jest Without Telling Them He Was...