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Six billion teenagers flexing their opposable thumbs:

SIX BILLION TEENAGERS FLEXING THEIR OPPOSABLE THUMBS: The early teens tend to be more difficult than the late teens; the twenties should be a bit easier, we say, we hear; the thirties easier still. In our forties or fifties we’ll be comfortable with our curriculum; when asked, we won’t remember why speed and poison were so fun in our teens or what made us think we were even close to adulthood in our twenties. Probably. Or if not, we can always select a new messiah and start over at zero. That's what makes calendars so fun.

Iconoclast stuck in a mainstream calendar? Go to Calendar Conversions (http://genealogy.org/~scottlee/calconvert.cgi) to find out what all the hoopla's about. (Hoopla, mind you.)

Forget your baktun.katun.tun.unial.kin? Get squared away at the University of Virginia's Mayan Calendar http://www.astro.virginia.edu/~eww6n/astro/MayanCalendar.html).

Pre–long-distance-service-peddling George Carlin (he used to be a comedian) once theorized that the best way to fight cancer was with another cancer. The people at 1001 Herbs have applied this theory — linguistically, at least — to their fabulous anti-acne product, Acne (http://1001herbs.com/acne/). "Acne is a homeopathic remedy beneficial for treating and preventing pimples and other skin acne. . . . Acne helps dry up pimples, clear affected skin areas and prevent future breakouts."