Reported Egypt Necrophilia Legislation Called 'Hoax' by Parliament

More fun without a pulse?
More fun without a pulse?

The age-old practice of banging your dead wife may be resurrected in Egypt, if members of the newly elected Islamist-dominated parliament have their say.

Or, so the Internet story goes.

Shocking reports circulated last week in Egyptian and Arab media outlets about a proposed "Farewell Intercourse" draft law, which allegedly stated that a husband would be able to legally fuck his partner's decomposing body for up to six hours following her death.

But early this week Al Arabiya News reported that several members of the Egyptian parliament denied the rumors originally published last Tuesday by Egyptian state-run al-Ahram newspaper and Egyptian ON TV, which spread to the International media outlets.

The People's Assembly Secretary General, Samy Mahran said, "I have never heard of anything in this regard."

Islamist MP Mamdouh Ismail told Al Arabiya, "This is indecent and nonsense. The whole issue is unacceptable. It is even unacceptable to give any statement to media about this issue."

Written records suggest the act of necrophilia dates back to Ancient Egypt. In order to discourage corpse intercourse, attractive dead chicks were left to decay for three to four days before being handed over to embalmers. Other societies in Southeast Asia, Central Europe and South America practiced necromancy to communicate with the deceased, and performed necrophilic deeds to consummate marriage after death, or to lay a virgin or soul to rest.

Hang on to your toe tags and body bags, boys and girls, that's not the only news to come from the transcontinental country. This kinky new measure was said to be part of a slew of questionable legislations being introduced for vote by Egyptian Islamist parliament members under 'alleged religious interpretations,' which included lowering the minimum age from 18 to 14 for a girl to marry, abolishing women's rights to an education and employment, and canceling the law that allows women in abusive relationships the ability to obtain a divorce without obstructions from her partner.

Last Wednesday a story surfaced regarding an appeal made by Dr. Mervat al-Talawi, head of Egypt's National Council for Women (NCW), to the Egyptian People's Assembly Speaker, Dr. Saad al-Katatni, regarding the potential poll. Women's organizations were in fear Islamist parliament members wanted to eliminate laws they claimed were "aiming to destroy families," which were implemented by the former first lady of the fallen regime, Suzanne Mubarak. MP's were also accused of attacking women's rights since the uprising that toppled president Hosni Mubarak, in February 2011.

Controversy erupted a year ago when Moroccan cleric, Zamzami Abdul Bari, spoke out about a husbands right to fornicate with his departed mate, and was the first to address the 'Farewell Intercourse' issue, saying that marriage remains valid even after death, adding that a woman had the same right to engage in sex with her lifeless husband. Known for spewing some crazy shit, Zamzami created an uproar two years ago in Morocco when he announced it was cool for pregnant chicks to consume alcohol.

Here's the update: This week MP Hisham Ahmed Hanafi told the London-based Asharq al-Awsat, "Such reports are completely false and aim mainly to deform the image of the Egyptian parliament."

MP Ashraf Agour of the Construction and Development Party also rebuffed the reports saying, "The issue has never been discussed in the parliament."

And MP Amin Eskandar of al-Karama Party was also quoted, "These kinds of controversial laws are very dangerous and create a state of fear inside the community, the general atmosphere in the Egyptian parliament is vulnerable to such kinds of rumors."

He did however confirm to Asharq al-Awsat the presence of a draft law for the early marriage age change, from 18 to 14.

Analysts are claiming the necrophilia news piece was a hoax planted by supporters of Hosni Mubarak to defame Egyptian Islamists in power.

After the announcement they all went out for a stiff one.

Drink, that is.

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