MAKE US LAUGH FUNNY BOY

Dave Hill needs an introduction -- but not for long. The self-described New York-based "performer, musician, actor, comedy-type person, artist, and thinking man" comes to town for his latest one-man show Big in Japan, which apparently he is.

You seem pretty comfortable interviewing celebrities and people from all walks of life -- does Hollywood know what to do with you?

I feel like I have been dropping a lot of hints, but so far I am not entirely sure if Hollywood knows what do with me. Or maybe Hollywood does know and just isn't telling me yet. I hope Hollywood tells me soon though because my parents have made it very clear I can't move back in with them at this point. They claim to be using the basement for "other things" now. The balls on these people.

What would you like Hollywood to do with you?

I would like Hollywood to take me out to a classy dinner and then give me my own talk show or simply a weekly time slot on a popular television channel with which to give America (and parts of Canada) the show of a lifetime. It can be at 11:30 p.m. or 12:30 a.m. I am not picky. Plus, I already have the outfits. If none of that works out though, I have an idea for a show in which I team up with a monkey that has both a penchant for mischief and the ability to solve crimes. Sure, we fight a lot, but I can't stay mad at him.

Will you be taking any meeting while you are here?

I plan on taking a lot of high-powered meetings while I am in town, many of them with the President of Show Business. Lives will be bought and sold before I can even get the cap off my complimentary water. And my hair will look incredible the whole time. This town is back!You seem pretty comfortable interviewing celebrities and people from all walks of life -- does Hollywood know what to do with you?

Dave Hill needs an introduction -- but not for long. The self-described New York-based "performer, musician, actor, comedy-type person, artist, and thinking man" comes to town for his latest one-man show Big in Japan, which apparently he is.

You seem pretty comfortable interviewing celebrities and people from all walks of life -- does Hollywood know what to do with you?

I feel like I have been dropping a lot of hints, but so far I am not entirely sure if Hollywood knows what do with me. Or maybe Hollywood does know and just isn't telling me yet. I hope Hollywood tells me soon though because my parents have made it very clear I can't move back in with them at this point. They claim to be using the basement for "other things" now. The balls on these people.

What would you like Hollywood to do with you?

I would like Hollywood to take me out to a classy dinner and then give me my own talk show or simply a weekly time slot on a popular television channel with which to give America (and parts of Canada) the show of a lifetime. It can be at 11:30 p.m. or 12:30 a.m. I am not picky. Plus, I already have the outfits. If none of that works out though, I have an idea for a show in which I team up with a monkey that has both a penchant for mischief and the ability to solve crimes. Sure, we fight a lot, but I can't stay mad at him.

Will you be taking any meeting while you are here?

I plan on taking a lot of high-powered meetings while I am in town, many of them with the President of Show Business. Lives will be bought and sold before I can even get the cap off my complimentary water. And my hair will look incredible the whole time. This town is back!I feel like I have been dropping a lot of hints, but so far I am not entirely sure if Hollywood knows what do with me. Or maybe Hollywood does know and just isn't telling me yet. I hope Hollywood tells me soon though because my parents have made it very clear I can't move back in with them at this point. They claim to be using the basement for "other things" now. The balls on these people.

What would you like Hollywood to do with you?

I would like Hollywood to take me out to a classy dinner and then give me my own talk show or simply a weekly time slot on a popular television channel with which to give America (and parts of Canada) the show of a lifetime. It can be at 11:30 p.m. or 12:30 a.m. I am not picky. Plus, I already have the outfits. If none of that works out though, I have an idea for a show in which I team up with a monkey that has both a penchant for mischief and the ability to solve crimes. Sure, we fight a lot, but I can't stay mad at him.

Will you be taking any meeting while you are here?

I plan on taking a lot of high-powered meetings while I am in town, many of them with the President of Show Business. Lives will be bought and sold before I can even get the cap off my complimentary water. And my hair will look incredible the whole time. This town is back!Dave Hill needs an introduction -- but not for long. The self-described New York-based "performer, musician, actor, comedy-type person, artist, and thinking man" comes to town for his latest one-man show Big in Japan, which apparently he is.

You seem pretty comfortable interviewing celebrities and people from all walks of life -- does Hollywood know what to do with you?

I feel like I have been dropping a lot of hints, but so far I am not entirely sure if Hollywood knows what do with me. Or maybe Hollywood does know and just isn't telling me yet. I hope Hollywood tells me soon though because my parents have made it very clear I can't move back in with them at this point. They claim to be using the basement for "other things" now. The balls on these people.

What would you like Hollywood to do with you?

I would like Hollywood to take me out to a classy dinner and then give me my own talk show or simply a weekly time slot on a popular television channel with which to give America (and parts of Canada) the show of a lifetime. It can be at 11:30 p.m. or 12:30 a.m. I am not picky. Plus, I already have the outfits. If none of that works out though, I have an idea for a show in which I team up with a monkey that has both a penchant for mischief and the ability to solve crimes. Sure, we fight a lot, but I can't stay mad at him.

Will you be taking any meeting while you are here?

I plan on taking a lot of high-powered meetings while I am in town, many of them with the President of Show Business. Lives will be bought and sold before I can even get the cap off my complimentary water. And my hair will look incredible the whole time. This town is back!

Thu., Feb. 18, 9:30 p.m., 2010


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