This weeks traffic-etiquette lesson: Look, if youre not going to use your blinkers when youre changing lanes, could you at least signal first before shooting someone on the freeway? Thanks. FRIDAY, MAY 13 Dont believe for one second that Kathy Griffin doesnt suffer for her art. Shes scathingly ridiculed playfully teased so many celebrities that she says she cant even go to Fred Segal anymore for fear that she might get attacked by a mob of Julias and Justins. Griffins finally getting her own reality-TV show (on Bravo later this year), but you must see her live to appreciate how fast and feverish that gal can talk. Her new show is demurely titled Shy Lady! We love you, Kathy Griffin! Please never change. At the L.A. Gay & Lesbian Centers Renberg Theater, 1125 N. McCadden Pl., Hlywd.; Fri.-Sat., May 13-14, 8 p.m.; Sun., May 15, 7 p.m.; $25. (323) 860-7300. Remember when everyone in Silver Lake had a band? Now theyve all got sewing machines and want to dress you. Fashion Roadkill & Hello? The Environment T-Shirt Construction Night VI is the unwieldy title of an event at Matrushka where you can choose some scraps and theyll make you a custom T-shirt while you drink wine and wait for Spaceland to open. At Matrushka Construction, 4281 Fountain Ave., Silver Lake; 7-11 p.m. (323) 665-4513. SATURDAY, MAY 14 Though no one can afford to live there, the city of Santa Monica flaunts its virtues in your face at the annual Santa Monica Festival. And just to rub it in even more, the lineup of music and entertainment is excellent: I See Hawks in L.A., O-Maya, Paul Livingstone & the Arohi Ensemble, plus emcee Maria Elena Fernandez. Lots of kiddie acts, art workshops, food and shopping round it out. Afterward, everyone goes home to various areas that arent Santa Monica and either gets depressed about where they live or lectures their friends about how they prefer their Echo Park shit-box. Clover Park, 2600 Ocean Park Blvd., Santa Monica; 11 a.m.-7 p.m.; free. (213) 365-0605.
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Get subversive (for $25?! nothings cheap anymore) at Adventures in Illegal Art, which the organizers are calling an in-your-face perspective on contemporary culture, bringing together the sound collages of Negativlands Mark Hosler and a slew of visual artists, including Winston Smith (of the Dead Kennedys album covers), Robbie Conal, Wayne Coe, Ann E. Cutting and more. San Franciscos Vau de Vire Society provides the avente cabare, which we think means avant-cabaret. Part of the proceeds benefit Reaching to Embrace Arts. At the Henry Fonda Theater, 6126 Hollywood Blvd., Hlywd.; 7 p.m.-2 a.m. www.Metamorpheus.org. See Go-Pick. SUNDAY, MAY 15 Theres another free street festival this weekend, though lacking ocean breezes and HBO sponsorship. The NoHo Theater and Arts Festival features more than 70 performers, including the Platters, Brasi Brazil Extravaganza and the famed Toy Theater from Russia. Lankershim Blvd., betw. Chandler & Camarillo; Sat.-Sun., May 14-15, 11 a.m.-8 p.m.; free. (818) 505-5155. Does anyone actually know the rules to croquet? Somebody at the Hollyhock House must, because the whole reopening titled the Hollyhock Croquet Classic is planned around it, Come dressed in a 1920s costume and enjoy a few games and a picnic. Hollyhock House and Barnsdall Art Park, 4800 Hollywood Blvd.; 1-4 p.m.; $26, $13 children. (323) 663-1664. MONDAY, MAY 16 We all know that the musical scores that accompany video games have to be experienced live for the full effect. Wait we do? Well, anyway, More Friends Music from Final Fantasy With Special Guests features a full orchestra performing the works of Arnie Roth and Nobuo Uematsu, names youd recognize if you played Final Fantasy video games incessantly. The ork will also dig into an oldies bag and play the tunes you loves from Pong and Donkey Kong. Gibson Amphitheater, Universal City; 8 p.m.; $90-$40. (213) 252-8497. TUESDAY, MAY 17 Theres an election today, so you have two choices: Vote and stay glued to local election coverage. Or tell everyone you voted and stayed glued to election coverage, but really watch Chaos, the new reality show with Britney Spears and her husband, Kevin Federline, debuting on UPN at 9 p.m. WEDNESDAY, MAY 18 Its already Wednesday and we forgot to mention its Bike to Work Week, a.k.a. Please Dont Hit Those Cyclists Taking Up Too Much of Your Road. The film poster for The Night of the Hunter proclaimed: The wedding night, the anticipation, the kiss, the knife. BUT ABOVE ALL . . . THE SUSPENSE! And Robert Mitchum was the first badass to have LOVE and HATE tattooed on his knuckles (take that, Spike Lee!). AFI presents the film as part of its 100 Years . . . 100 Movies series at the ArcLight, 6360 Sunset Blvd., Hlywd.; 8 p.m.; $11. (323) 464-4226. THURSDAY, MAY 19 It was while driving to Graumans Chinese Theater that composer Harold Arlen came up with the melody for Over the Rainbow. Studio powers-that-be deleted the song from The Wizard of Oz three times, claiming the difficult-to-sing octave leap in the word somewhere was troublesome. As the worlds worst singer, thats never stopped me from belting it out. Arlen (born Hyman Arluck) wrote some 400 other songs, including Its Only a Paper Moon, Stormy Weather, Ive Got the World on a String and Ac-Cent-Tchu-Ate the Positive. Michael Feinstein hosts A Centennial Tribute to Harold Arlen, with film clips, live music and a talk. At the Academy of Motion Picture Arts and Sciences, 8949 Wilshire Blvd., Beverly Hills; 8 p.m.; $5. (310) 247-3000.