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Ugly Christmas Sweaters: Cat Edition

You like cats. You like Christmas. You like sweaters. Put them together, however, and you have the unholiest of unholy unions. Here are 21 of the ugliest holiday cat sweaters available right now on Ebay. They ship promptly...from Hell.

1. Little White Angel Kitten...With Green Devil Eyes!

"Hand knit" says the seller. So ugly it comes back all the way around to cute. Almost.

Ugly Christmas Sweaters: Cat Edition

2. Cat In Stocking With Hidden Creepiness

The eyes light up.

Ugly Christmas Sweaters: Cat Edition

3. Angora Cats

Speaking of eyes...wait, where are their eyes???

Ugly Christmas Sweaters: Cat Edition

4. Pile O'Snow Cats

Nothing more fun than a pile of cats buried in snow.

Ugly Christmas Sweaters: Cat Edition

5. How Much Is That Kitty In The Window Sweater?

Ten bucks. Five for the front view, five for the back view.

Ugly Christmas Sweaters: Cat Edition

6. Unisex Cats

"Could be worn by either man or woman," says the seller. Yeah. That's not exactly a selling point where cat sweaters are concerned.

Ugly Christmas Sweaters: Cat Edition

7. Cat, Bird, House, Tree

"Actually this sweater is really cute," says the seller. Sounds like someone's been staring at the internet for too long.

Ugly Christmas Sweaters: Cat Edition

 

8. Sad Kittens

Oh come on! This one's not even a Christmas sweater proper. It was marketed as such, however. Maybe that's why the kittens are sad. So sad.

Ugly Christmas Sweaters: Cat Edition

9. Give the Gift of Cats

"The design is very bright and stands out in a crowd," says the seller. Yes.

Ugly Christmas Sweaters: Cat Edition

10. A Plethora of Cats

Know what's scary about this sweater? It costs $49.99. That's approximately $2 per cat.

Ugly Christmas Sweaters: Cat Edition

11. Cats In Santa Hats

Why are the cats in Santa hats? Why are there so many hats? Why are the hats floating above the cats? Were there once other cats for the floating hats?

Ugly Christmas Sweaters: Cat Edition

12. Megabling Cats Sweater

"The gold sequins are numerous, along with a generous helping of shiny beads," says the seller. But $59.99? What's with the ugly cat sweater price inflation?

Ugly Christmas Sweaters: Cat Edition

13. Candy Cane Skate Cat

"You are bidding on an adorable holiday sweater, perfect for wearing to the office, holiday parties - just about anywhere," says the seller. Insert snarky comment here.

Ugly Christmas Sweaters: Cat Edition

14. Cat Sweater-Wearer's Anonymous

So bad he had to wear a mask.

Ugly Christmas Sweaters: Cat Edition

 

15. Neon Cat Craptrappery

In the seller's words: "What a masterful piece of craptappery, a five paragraph persuasive essay this sweater does not need to write! Check out all the beautiful madness...blinding to the eyes." Correct.

Ugly Christmas Sweaters: Cat Edition

16. Cats In Your Bosoms

We're in ur sweaterz, peepin thru ur bosoms.

Ugly Christmas Sweaters: Cat Edition

17. Cat Sweater Vest

Are those shadows...or blood?

Ugly Christmas Sweaters: Cat Edition

18. 3D Ice "Staking" Cat Sweater

Frankly, the three dimensional nature of this sweater is disturbing. It's described as an ice "staking" cat sweater, "for men." Riiiight.

Ugly Christmas Sweaters: Cat Edition

19. Sour Puss Takes A Holiday

This cat looks angry. It hates its stocking. It hates Christmas. It hates snow, and the color white, and presents, and gift receipts, and mistletoe. It hates that red ribbon dangling over its head. It hates boughs of holly. It hates buttons. It hates you. It hates me. It hates Ebay. It hates this blog post. Most of all, it hates sweaters. Oh, how it hates sweaters. Grrr!

Ugly Christmas Sweaters: Cat Edition

20. Dramatic Cat...Sweater

Cats in sweaters are closer than they appear.

Ugly Christmas Sweaters: Cat Edition

21. Severed Mouse Head Cat Sweater

Okay, the three dimensional nature of THIS sweater is frankly disturbing.

Ugly Christmas Sweaters: Cat Edition

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