Real Housewives of Beverly Hills: Retail Therapy and the Lisa Vanderpump-Adrienne Maloof Feud Over the Palms Hotel

Adrienne Maloof and Lisa Vanderpump hug it out. Does this conflict look resolved or what?
Adrienne Maloof and Lisa Vanderpump hug it out. Does this conflict look resolved or what?
bravotv.com

Where is our pesky gajillionaires etiquette manual when we need it? We hate when we can't figure out which Vegas hotel owner friend we should choose to host our daughter's bachelorette party.

Such was Lisa Vanderpump's dilemma, and what sparked a tiff between her and fellow Housewife Adrienne Maloof, owner of the Palms Hotel in Las Vegas. Adrienne was miffed that Lisa's daughter, Pandora, was set to have her hens weekend at Planet Hollywood -- the owner of which is also a dear friend of Lisa's, and offered to host Pandy and her dozens of drunk friends. Hear that, Adrienne? Offered. Adrienne thought Lisa should have asked her to "roll out the red carpet" at the Palms because, we guess, one bizillionaire asking another to comp 10 suites and keep champagne flowing for 72 hours is no imposition at all. As long as said fabulous good time no one else could afford is captured on camera to use for promotional purposes. See, this is why we need to brush up on the rules.

Adrienne Maloof and her shoes for "everyday." (Everyday prostitutes, that is.)
Adrienne Maloof and her shoes for "everyday." (Everyday prostitutes, that is.)
bravotv.com

Adrienne confronted Lisa on this point while hosting a fashion show for her new shoe line. But not really for the shoe line, because Adrienne didn't want the shoes to distract from the real purpose of the event, which was raising money for Step Up, an organization that empowers young women to become entrepreneurs. Adrienne was helping girls step up alright. Right into some hooker shoes. Every shoe on that runway looked like it was headed straight for the pole. We think it's noble that Adrienne, a successful businesswoman in her own right, is involved with this organization, but a future in fuck-me boots is probably not what they had in mind.

Taylor Armstrong, not quite ready to see Camille Grammer.
Taylor Armstrong, not quite ready to see Camille Grammer.
bravotv.com

In other party news, Camille and Taylor had an awkward run-in outside the bathroom, made such because they hadn't seen each other since Camille exposed Taylor's allegations of abuse at a tea party. In a display of unHousewife-like class, the two simply said hello and agreed to talk at another time.

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Especially smart, since the accused domestic abuser, Russell Armstrong, was out in the garden swilling Scotch. Yes, he actually saddled up and accompanied his wife to this party. Even Taylor said it was awkward to have him there, and it so was, wasn't it? It shined a bright light on the mixed messages all the other Housewives are complaining about. Here's this guy they all hear is hitting his wife playing the role of attentive husband. In the limo, he tells Taylor of why he decided to come: "I really know that you need the support. I know you've had a difficult time lately, and I think we're going to have a really nice evening." Really? Russell sounded like a robot programmed to say nice things when cameras were around.

In a risky yet likely bankable move by Bravo, we got a look into Russell and Taylor's therapy sessions in this episode. Apparently they'd been seeing a doctor of osteopathy. Ok, we had to Google osteopathy to be sure but as far as we can tell, DOs seem about as close to MDs as chiropractors, and seem to have little or no training in psychology. We hate to think how much this might explain.

Russell recited more robotic lines about addressing his anger, and Taylor asked for a clean slate which, in a move that upped his credibility, the "doc" labeled immature.

To state the obvious, it's sad. Truly sad. But not because Russell committed suicide. It's much worse watching a woman who has no idea what love and respect feels like hold her abusive husband's hand, fight back tears and rack her brain for what else she can do to make the marriage work. In an earlier scene with the two, Russell calls Camille's allegations of abuse completely false. What's the point of therapy if Russell and Taylor can't even discuss the meat of the problem? Obviously this won't end well, but we already knew that.

Worse yet, previews show us Taylor is headed for meltdown number three next week. Is this feeling gratuitous to anyone else? Right now, with a season so full of downfall, we can only hope Taylor's upswing is being documented for next year.

Follow Ali Trachta on Twitter at @MySo_CalLife and for more arts news follow @LAWeeklyArts.

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