I Am...Doll Parts
So, I was bored one evening (tonight, as it happens) and as we do in the digital age I decided to google my name and find out what other Steffies exist on this planet. There's a lot of us in Europe: a couple Germans, a Steffie from the Netherlands, and a Brit Steffie who blogs about her "frolics." 19-year-old Steffie from Glasgow's Myspace "about me" reads: "hey y'all, steffie doll comin atchya xx hey im stef , im 19 from buzzin renfreeewww :S i thanks u lot, u all mean the world to mee.." Think she's drunk? I can't tell. There's also a Steffie who lives on an Indian reservation, and a 23-year-old Steffie in South Pasadena. Steffie Woolhandler is a professor of medicine at Harvard, and Mrs. Steffie Rhodes starred in a Marcus Welby, MD episode from 1975.
But the most intriguing Steffie I found tonight is a long-lost relative of Barbie, a collectible doll whose face was later transposed onto Barbie's much more famous li'l sis PJ (damn her!).
Here's a description from www.dollreference.com, which describes the "Steffie" doll pictured above:
"Medium blonde hair curly ends, & bangs, blue eyes, painted eyelashes, one piece shorts-suit, blue hot pants, pink & white checked long sleeve blouse, pink & white checked knee-hi socks, white shoes, black & white small checked belt & hat, special hands that can hold or grasp items. A record player, T.V., telephone, serving tray with 2 glasses and travel case all in brown plastic were included."
Pretty sassy, huh? A one-piece shorts suit with checkered knee socks sounds right up my alley! Not to mention a record layer and serving tray with two glasses! And I'm so glad the Steffie doll has got hands that can "hold or grasp items", as this is very important for a young lady.
And speaking of young ladies and hands that can grasp items, the Urban Dictionary offers a staggering number of variations on the Steffie theme.
According to whoever writes this thing, Steffie means:
1) a short girl with really big boobs
2) one who stares at people
as in: Stop staring at me! You're such a Steffie!
A Steffie-dee, on the other hand, has two very distinct meanings, that have nothing to do with big boobs.
1) A woman with small boobs (bee stings)
2) A women who has no sense of dress and looks like a tramp.
1. How small are her steffie-dee's!
2. That women is a Full on Steffie-Dee wanna-be!
Steffy butts, in case you were wondering, are simply "people who are unusually weird."
Spelled Steffi, it "means you are having a laff, because you would say having a steffi graff. which is like having a laff."
Spelled Stefi, it basically means dumbass.
adj- word used to express ignorance or retardness.
noun- a person who crashes a lot and engages into several accidents including vehicles.
- I've never heard something more ignorant. You're such a Stefi today!
- That Stefi crashed my car five times today!
Luckily, there's Stefy, which is defined as:
The greatest girl and best friend one could have in this world. The most extreme rarity of a person. *sidenote* EXTREMELY hot and SUPER sexy. She WILL make u want her so badly by just LOOKING at her.
Tell me something I didn't know.
xo- the REAL Steffie
Steffie Talk Busy 1972 doll courtesy of dollreference.com
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