MORE

50 Craziest Occupy Movements of 2011

Occupy this...or that...or whatever you damn well please.
Occupy this...or that...or whatever you damn well please.
photo by Colin Young-Wolff

Twenty Eleven has been a year of occupies. Occupations. Occupitudes. You get the idea.

Sure, the Occupy Wall Street movement has only been around since September, but since then we've been occupying all manner of whatnot like there's no tomorrow (thanks to the Mayans, there actually might not be one in 2012). We've even been occupying all the bizarre intangibles that the internet and the clever asses behind it can come up with.

Here are the 50 craziest. If you make it to the end, there's a page you can lick that tastes like blue raspberry Kool-Aid.

Dancing at City Hall
Dancing at City Hall
Nanette Gonzales

50. Occupy Broadway

"The Streets are Our Stage" boasted one sign. Yes. Yes they are. These thespians put on a chunk of street theater in support of the actual Occupy movement.

49. Occupy Law & Order

Because 99 percent of the police procedurals utilize a collective 1 percent of the national intellect.

48. Occupy Sesame Street

We're pretty sure all of that fur is billy-club proof, and that pepper spray is no match for those beady eyes...

47. Occupy IHOP

Join the fight against big breakfast? Ugh.

46. Occupy Boston Market

Some chubby kid...sitting there...until the Boston Bruins lost a game. Which they did. End of story.

45. Occupy Disney World / Land

"Because 99 percent of the fast passes go to 1 percent of the people..." or something like that. There's no shortage of Disney fanatics who would be willing to unnecessarily defend these causes.

44. Occupy Lego

This one's actually awesome.

43. Occupy Game Day

There's nothing more important than college football. 1% 99%...blah blah blah...go deep, touchdown, or whatever.

42. Occupy L.A. Live / Rose Parade / other L.A. hot spots

This one speaks for itself.

41. Occupy Christmas / Kwanzaa / Festivus / Hanukkah / Non-Sectarian Winter Light Holiday

You get the idea. Occupy those holidays...with multicultural vigor!

40. Occupy the North Pole

Santa is definitely the top 1 percent of the top 1 percent...but, like, he gives it all away...so why bother occupying his hometown? We suppose we'll never understand.

50 Craziest Occupy Movements of 2011
Nanette Gonzales

39. Occupy Naked Santas / Santacon

Stick it to...The Man...by being drunk, belligerent, and without clothing? We're not sure what message he's supposed to get with this one.

38. Occupy the Tundra

Because you've got to fight for your right to be in the middle of nowhere...

37. Occupy Skyrim

From what we've heard, after playing the video game Skyrim, it would be hard to occupy anything else but Skyrim. We know this one guy who hasn't seen the light of day since it came out.

36. Occupy Mordor

We're definitely sure that the Dark Lord does not respect your rights of habeas corpus...so you might not want to go the whole non-violent route here. Maybe bring an army...and some badass wizard of some kind?

35. Occupy Cybertron

Wasn't Cybertron destroyed? Sorry, nerds, did we miss something? Nice toys, though.

34. Occupy Arrakis

Because the House Harkonnen's anti-Atreides policies and their monopoly on Melange production....oh, wait, wrong forum. Yeah, it doesn't get nerdier than Dune references.

33. Occupy Poland, Germany, Sudatenland, etc etc.

...anything that mimics a post-1938 kind of situation. Frankly, anywhere once occupied by either the Nazis or red army just doesn't sound, um, kosher. How's about just Solidarity? That one worked really well.

32. Occupy Green / Red Chile

Heirloom peppers -- at least someone cares about them.

31. Occupy Cinefamily!

Ok, fine, they didn't call it an Occupy...but they had a 24hr telethon that might has well been one. Everyone from Stephin Merritt to Elliot Gould came by to help raise some funds. Oh, Jonathan Gold came by, too.

30. Occupy Curriculum

Someone's gotta explain this all to the kids, right?

 

Occupy your best signage.
Occupy your best signage.
photo by Colin Young-Wolff

29. Occupy the Vatican

Just add "excessive wealth" to the laundry list of grievances against the polarizing two-thousand year old institution...maybe nail them somewhere? On a cathedral door of some kind? Might be easier and cheaper.

28. Occupy Building 7

Get out your tinfoil hats...add some Truther and Birther magic, and you've got a New World Order Conspiracy sandwich. Where's an Occupy Sanity group when you need it?

27. Occupy Herbalism

No, not that kind of herb...the other kind...the healthier kind...occupy it.

26. Occupy Adoption

No, seriously, the adoption industry is pretty messed up.

25. Occupy Earth

Or not. Most of us have absolutely no choice in the matter. Thanks for reminding us.

24. Occupy Poetry

Maybe they can come up with better synonyms for "occupy" and do it in metered rhyme? That might make for a better occupy lexicon.

23. Occupy Compassion

Yeah, that too.

22. Occupy Duvet

Because it's cold...in your $1.5 million condo...with all that air conditioning on...

21. Occupy Your Bank Account

...if such a thing is even possible.

20. Occupy Bacon

Sir Fancis Bacon? No. The overused pork product. Occupy it...or let it occupy you?

Occu Pie!
Occu Pie!

19. Occupy the Future

You just did. Just now. Kind of hard to avoid, right?

18. Occupy A Small Suburban White-Bread Town

Occupy Greenwich, CT is easily the wittiest of the occupy tweeters. Check it.

17. Occupy Your Mind / Self-Improvement

Yep...it's pretty meta. Again, try NOT to occupy your mind...woah.

16. Occupy a Small Town Bar

Because small town bars need the business, right?

15. Occupy My Birthday / My House

There are way too many of these to list. How many evites, emails, facebook party invites, and so on did you receive this fall imploring you to occupy someone's living room, kitchen, porch or back yard -- all in the name of a shitty joke? You should stop being friends with those people.

14. Occupy My Pants / Your Pants

Sigh. More like "Too Lame to Fail".

13. Occupy Your Mom / My Mom

This one hasn't been funny since you were above water on your mortgage...zing...too soon?

12. Occupy Your Job and Earn a Living

The rallying cry of the conservative anti-occupy masses...."Get a job!" they yelled from the easy chairs they bought with their unemployment checks.

11. Occupy Improv

Because no one...we mean NO ONE is doing improv anymore.

 

Occupy Balls Deep
Occupy Balls Deep

10. Occupy the High Five

Seems harmless...and positively positive.

9. Occupy My Balls / Deez Nuts

Speaks for itself; because there are some things you have to take seriously.

8. Ocuu-Pie

There's no revolution quite like a pizza-based one.

7. Occupy Apps

But what if they take your smart phone?

6. Occupy Memes

There are literally thousands of these. From the UC pepper-spraying guy, to half of the ones we mentioned above. The one thing we've occupied most this year....memes.

5. Occupy Karaoke.

A bunch of kids in L.A. did karaoke for 25 days in a row.

Is this guy trying to get his camera occupied by an image of that woman's ass?
Is this guy trying to get his camera occupied by an image of that woman's ass?
Nanette Gonzales

4. Occupy Dat Ass

This is something we can all...um...get behind, right?

3. Occupy My Ass

Ibid.

2. Occupy the Front Cover of Time Magazine

The Protester did make some pretty awesome strides in 2011. Maybe s/he will make a few more in 2012.

1. Occupy the National Lexicon

I think we've proven this one. What will 2012's word / activity of the year? Engross? Immerse? Preoccupy? We'll just have to wait and see.

Follow @PaulTBradley and @LAWeeklyArts on Twitter.


Sponsor Content