Barbie Davenporte

Barbie Davenporte

Educated and emphatic with extensive experience in the journalism and adult entertainment industries, Davenporte has seen it all -- and done some of it. Not the relationship type, she does everything (and everyone) she can to keep her skills and outlook fresh.

Articles By Barbie Davenporte

  • Toys Are Your Friend
    Toys Are Your Friend
    These Are Tools, Not Replacements, Fellas.
    Category: Pretty Talk

    I hear countless stories about dudes who are threatened by sex toys.Common quote-worthy comments:“My chick doesn’t need that.”“A real man doesn’t need a toy to make his chick cum”“She’s gonna love that rabbit more than me.”Sure, sex toys are... More >>

  • Grabbing Porn Stars Press Junk-ets With Tabitha Stevens
    Grabbing Porn Stars Press Junk-ets With Tabitha Stevens
    Tabitha Stevens & Kagney Linn Karter Have Sex
    Category: Pretty Talk

    I spent a chunk of my afternoon yesterday in the heart of Hollywood at a press junket taking place at a hotel that also housed the 2010 National Sexual Assault Conference. It was only appropriate that this junket promoted a porno that featured the star’s first interracial fuckfest.Sure... More >>

  • LA Gets Sexy For AfterDarkLA.com
    LA Gets Sexy For AfterDarkLA.com
    LA Weekly Takes Over Bardot in Hollywood
    Category: L.A. Libido

    And here I sit wearing sunglasses the size of dinner plates and sucking/nibbling on a banana because some guy on Twitter told me potassium prevents your brain from exploding. (Or something like that...it's hard to read that shit with these shades on.) Though you might not envy the puffy... More >>

  • Warner Bros is Into Bears. I Knew It.
    Warner Bros is Into Bears. I Knew It.
    3D Movie About Furries feat. Justin Timberlake
    Category: L.A. Libido

    I bet I'm not the only one who's been waiting to exhale since bating breath in anticipation of “Yogi Bear 3D.” Now the collective sound of shallow huffing, the kind you hear in the back row at midnight movies and Marshalls dressing rooms, is echoing throughout office... More >>

  • Craigslist Missed Connection #322
    Craigslist Missed Connection #322
    To the Girl That Gave Me Head/Balls
    Category: Pretty Talk

    Girl that gave me BlowJob - m4w - 18 (NoHo)  Date: 2010-08-04, 10:40AM PDT  Girl that gave me head in the burger king PlayPlace What is your name???  Alrighty. Now don't get me wrong -- I'm most certainly not one to need name-swapping prior to fluid-swapping, but for... More >>

  • The Man Bib Makes BJs Better
    The Man Bib Makes BJs Better
    By Better, I Mean Goofy & Weird
    Category: Pretty Talk

    It’s been a dilemma and discussion topic among the sexes for centuries: What's the protocol following a particularly messy hand/blow/tit/foot/etc. job? Should the receiving end have planned ahead and kept a clean-up tool within cock’s reach? Will one of those T-shirts balled in... More >>

  • Facebook Stalking From Across the Pond
    Facebook Stalking From Across the Pond
    Not A Way to Meet Chicks
    Category: Pretty Talk

    Facebook: Flattering attention whores and creeping out normal chicks since 2004. I received this direct message via Facebook today...sent to my personal Facebook account.This is significant because my personal Facebook account is neutral. Not sexy, nothing out of the ordinary, and nothing... More >>

  • Don't Fake It. Just F@&% It.
    Don't Fake It. Just F@&% It.
    Just Say a Screaming NO
    Category: Pretty Talk

    A word to all the women out there who fake their way through one-nighters and short-term hook-ups. (And if you’re still doing it after your wedding night, you’d better find something to fill the hole/void.)Please stop pretending to have raging orgasms. You’re not doing anyone a... More >>

  • How to Have Sex With Your Fave Celeb
    How to Have Sex With Your Fave Celeb
    Make Sure You Read the Fine Print
    Category: Pretty Talk

    Growing up, I convinced my friends – and, in turn, myself – that Donnie Wahlberg of The New Kids on the Block had written a special song for me on the Step By Step album.Track 6. (Yeah, I had lots of friends.)You could say I was an uber-fan of the band’s “bad boy,”... More >>

  • Courtney Love Says Ugly Girls Do It Best
    Courtney Love Says Ugly Girls Do It Best
    (So Says the Ugly Girl.)
    Category: Pretty Talk

    Hm. Courtney Love says that pretty girls are bad in bed because they know they can get away with it. Meanwhile the “homely” girls (Love’s word choice, not mine) have to work a bit harder to, well, get it harder and therefore are better lays?[EDITOR’S NOTE: Of course she... More >>

  • How NOT to Have a Booty Call
    How NOT to Have a Booty Call
    First Step: Pick Within Your League
    Category: Pretty Talk

    I like to think we’re all guilty of fucking one or more people in our lifetime that later inspire us to make figurative vomit noises as we do whatever we can to erase them from memory.Booze, head trauma, lobotomy – none seem to work. (Yeah I’ve tried all three…do why you... More >>

  • How to F@#& With Sex Toys
    How to F@#& With Sex Toys
    And More Advice From the Radio
    Category: L.A. Libido

    LA Weekly After Dark editor Anne Hodder was on LA Talk Radio last week and she seemed to have forgotten to tell people to tune in. Luckily for the world, it’s available to download HERE so you can all listen in.Why does it matter? Well besides the fact that Hodder and LA After Dark lets... More >>

  • Christina Aguilera Goes XXX...Again
    Christina Aguilera Goes XXX...Again
    Latex, Pasties, Sex Toys - Oh My!
    Category: Pretty Talk

    I just wanted to make sure everyone on this thing called the Internet has seen Christina Aguilera's "much anticipated" music video for "Not Myself Tonight," another pop song that talks about what a slut/ho/nympho she's suddenly become. But she's not really like... More >>

  • May is Masturbation Month
    May is Masturbation Month
    Go Fuck Yourselves! No, Seriously!
    Category: L.A. Libido

    Our main ho at LAWeekly.com tells us May is Masturbation Month, something I surely would have known had I not been under the impression that we already celebrate that 12 times a year.Weekly breakdown:     • Make Me Moan Mondays    • Twat Tickling... More >>

  • How To Pick Up Chicks
    How To Pick Up Chicks
    Workshopping It
    Category: Hints & Advice

    I've come across a duo that works together to teach the men of L.A. (and the world I suppose) what it takes to bag a babe and not be a douche about it. Well that’s certainly a relief. Not sure what kind of curriculum most of these dudes have been studying, but if it’s taught by... More >>

  • Salute Your Shorts
    Salute Your Shorts
    L.A. Is Funny
    Category: L.A. Libido

    What I learned at the LA Comedy Shorts Festival.Thing I learned #1: There’s an LA Comedy Shorts Festival. It lets filmmakers who like fart jokes and fake accents submit their short films without worrying they’ll be up against a short documentary about wildlife conservation or the... More >>

  • Name Tag
    Name Tag
    Vagina Named Desire
    Category: L.A. Libido

    What’s in a name? Well, it depends! ·         Ladyslippers sound like the perfect wedding/christening flower until you look them up on Wikipedia and see they appear to have a varicose veins and a nasty case of the herp. ... More >>

  • Flitterati
    Flitterati
    Go Flit Yourself
    Category: L.A. Libido

    It’s not uncommon for me to make up multisyllabic samples of awesome in the form of words to add to my (and eventually Mirriam-Webster’s) vocabulary. As I was hunched over my Blackberry’s Ubertwitter/TwitterDeck/TwatStank app, giggling and hiding from motorcycle cops in... More >>

  • Craigslist Missed Connections
    Craigslist Missed Connections
    He To Loves Yu
    Category: L.A. Libido

    Buying coors light beer at Vons - m4w - 45 (Valencia) Date: 2010-04-07, 11:28AM PDT Top of Form we were in line together at vons Your were buying to cans coors light.Im upset I didnt ask you out..I to love beer and you were hot..I so hope you see this. David Hmm, I wonder how much... More >>

  • Standing O-vation
    Standing O-vation
    Hard Hat Area
    Category: Pretty Talk

    I almost had an orgasm standing up last week, and I think the sheer shock that it was about to happen — and the fact that my legs were about to give out — was the only reason it didn’t cum/come to fruition. I don’t think I’ve ever had an orgasm just flat out... More >>

  • Lesson #98
    Lesson #98
    Unlearn From Porn
    Category: Pretty Talk

    The porn scene: Girl and guy make out in the shower. Girl blows guy, guy flicks her clit a little with his finger. Then they start fucking and orgasms/pop-shots ensue.  The real-life scene: Girl and guy make out in the shower. Both are freezing because the warm water can’t hit... More >>

  • Regular Maintenance
    Regular Maintenance
    For the Boys
    Category: Pretty Talk

    Do: If you want special attention paid to certain areas of your anatomy, prep them. It’s more common than ever for ladies to trim or completely shave their nether regions, and though it’s a bitch to maintain, it certainly has its benefits. If you haven’t yet, try going... More >>

  • Missed Missed Connection
    Missed Missed Connection
    What Gives?
    Category: L.A. Libido

    Something’s just not right. I’m scouring Craigslist’s Missed Connections and I’m on the third page. I haven’t found one creepy, skeezy or rape-whistle-worthy post. What gives, guys? How am I supposed to judge whether or not the chick should let him tug on... More >>

  • Check Mate
    Check Mate
    It's On
    Category: Pretty Talk

    Living in the best L.A. neighborhood (subjective, I know) means you’ve gotta share thin 30s-era Spanish walls with your neighbors and hear every sneeze, squabble and sex act they explore. I’m learning a lot about my upstairs neighbor: ... More >>

  • A Decade of L.A. Leather
    A Decade of L.A. Leather
    Stockroom University's Leather Gala
    Category: L.A. Libido

    The Stockroom, L.A.’s oldest fetish, leather and latex manufacturer, hosted a cocktail gala at their retail shop at 2809 Sunset Blvd. in Silver Lake. The store celebrated L.A. Leather Week and 10 years of Mr. Los Angeles Leather by inviting the who’s-who of the city’s... More >>

  • Feverish?
    Feverish?
    Or Just Over it?
    Category: Pretty Talk

    I’m concerned. The man responsible for the best sex of my life is in town. We both knew Monday night would be the only night we’d have free to, you know, talk about the weather. But when the time came and the phone rang, I didn’t answer. WHAT??! Having sex all night,... More >>

  • Breaking News
    Breaking News
    Size Matters
    Category: L.A. Libido

    With what appears to be the first legitimate penis size report since Kinsey’s 1948 survey, one of the nation’s largest condom and novelty stores has released the results (kinda) of a study (sorta) that shows where the biggest dicks in the country live. And rather than... More >>

  • You Want What?
    You Want What?
    Speak Up
    Category: Pretty Talk

    I have a question. During what part of puberty, sex ed or birds-and-bees embarrassment do young men learn that barn yard noises are an optimal way to catch the attention of the opposite sex? I don’t remember this ever being an issue growing up in New Hampshire (there, the barnyard... More >>

  • First Impressions
    First Impressions
    Just FYI
    Category: Pretty Talk

    FYI to the male species: Don’t forget that first impressions often form before you make it to the first date. The way you initially make contact is judged. The way you go about asking the girl on a date is judged. And you’d better believe that the place you choose to take the... More >>

  • Craigslist Missed Connections
    Craigslist Missed Connections
    Break It Down
    Category: Pretty Talk

    THE MISSED CONNECTION: Office Depot - m4w - 48 (Ventura Blvd. Encino)Stopped my car around 10.30am this morning (convertible with the hood down) to let you cross in front of me so I could get a good look. I followed you into Office Depot, you broke the card reader when you swiped your card... More >>

  • Balance and Symmetry
    Balance and Symmetry
    Pierced
    Category: Pretty Talk

    I’m typing with one hand and it’s taking forever. My left hand is holding a mug of warm water mixed with 1/4 teaspoon of salt cupped around my right nipple. I pierced it last week. My left nipple was done almost exactly 5 years ago. At the time, I was young and in love with the... More >>

  • Blind Eye
    Blind Eye
    Do: Clean Up
    Category: Pretty Talk

    Do: Clean up. I left a bullet vibe, bottle of lube and giant stainless steel dildo next to my bed and managed not to notice them as I prepped for a date a few nights ago. At this point a pink silicone dildo has become as common a decor element as a table lamp, but I find it somewhat tragic... More >>

  • In Memoriam
    In Memoriam
    Bye Bye BootyCall
    Category: Pretty Talk

    I’m wearing grey today and shielding my sullen eyes from the too-fucking-bright Culver City sunshine in mourning of a dear frie– hmm wait, what do I call him? He’s definitely not a friend. Not a foe, either…and though it might fit by definition, I’d rather... More >>

  • Definitive Action
    Definitive Action
    Mortified at Most
    Category: Pretty Talk

    I went to a show at King King in Hollywood last night to watch six young and hip L.A.-ists mortify themselves on stage by reading diary entries written when they were angst-ridden, slutty teenagers. It’s called Mortified. Appropriate. One such speaker struck a chord. I related to her... More >>

  • Lesson #19 to Unlearn from Porn
    Lesson #19 to Unlearn from Porn
    Don't
    Category: Pretty Talk

    Not sure how to put this lightly…   …please don’t cum all over me.   The porn scene: Guy is banging girl. Both are about to cum. (She’s probably faking — sorry, had to insert that. Pun intended.) Then just as he hits his mark, he pulls out and... More >>

  • Lucubration: Don’t Go There
    Lucubration: Don’t Go There
    EVER
    Category: Hints & Advice

    The vagina is a sensitive spot. The skin can be irritated, scratched and chafed with hardly any effort. Most importantly, it has a specific pH balance that, when disrupted, can wreak havoc on the woman to which the vagina belongs. (There are at-home tests you can do to check your pH... More >>

  • White Out
    White Out
    Panty Power
    Category: Pretty Talk

    Never underestimate the power of white underwear. SIDENOTE: I use the term “underwear” in lieu of “panties,” a word I loathe. So when you read “underwear” imagine skimpy thongs and sexy boy-shorts, not granny-shorts. I won’t speak for every young... More >>

  • Planning Ahead
    Planning Ahead
    Category: Pretty Talk

    I suppose it’s inevitable that, as we grow older and our number of daily responsibilities increase despite our efforts otherwise, the random booty call can become more a burden than a pleasant surprise. When that telltale “ding ding!” from a text message sounds, I instantly... More >>

  • Priorities
    Priorities
    Wanna Play?
    Category: Pretty Talk

    So I was ready and inspired to write a ton of (well…more like 3) pieces of After Dark genius last night. But when I sat down at my desk in my armchair with my laptop propped on a pillow (professional AND tech-savvy — get in line, boys) my cellphone buzzed:"Wanna play?"... More >>

  • Missed Connections - Shut Her Island
    Missed Connections - Shut Her Island
    Shut Her Island
    Category: Pretty Talk

    THE MISSED CONNECTION: Asian Girl - 9:40pm Shutter Island Showing - Edwards Ren Alhambra - m4w - 25 (Alhambra) Wow is all I can say. You were the asian girl sitting in front of me with the short skirt. You have an amazing body. I caught a glimpse of your ass when you were in the parking... More >>

  • Single in the City
    Single in the City
    Go-Time
    Category: Pretty Talk

    When I moved to Los Angeles several years ago, I was in an enviably steady, loving relationship with my best friend. (A dude.) But soon after being introduced to the adult world and its opportunities – especially the sexual ones – I realized my beau's excitement failed to... More >>

  • Just Breathe
    Just Breathe
    Sex Etiquette
    Category: Pretty Talk

    Don’t: When you’re on top, and we’re getting close to the big finale, please don’t choke me. Sounds like a “duh” no-brainer, but for some reason there are men out there who (maybe they saw it in a porno or two, or are just angry all the time) feel the... More >>

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