Not bad, but you just use http://getlaid.us/
it helps me to find some better local picks than CL...
By Hillel Aron
By Joseph Tsidulko
By Patrick Range McDonald
By David Futch
By Hillel Aron
By Dennis Romero
By Jill Stewart
By Dennis Romero
A zipless fuck, with wireless ease. That's the promise of the "Casual Encounters" section of Craigslist. There are newer, shinier, more feature-laden places to go searching for slutdom, of course, but the list of Craig endures.
Although the Internet is teeming with porn, porn is about watching. Personals are about doing. Casual Encounters gives form and encouragement to your basest desires — the ones in which you hit it and quit, in which you put in your junk but not your time — leaving you free immediately afterward to get back to Farmville or eBaum's World or whatever more important thing you were doing when you got distracted by the urge and clicked on m4m, or w4m, or mm4ts, mw4mw, w4mm, t4mw or maybe mw4t.
What you might have told yourself at the start was just idle curiosity can easily morph into enthusiastic participation as the site's clean, simple interface leads you into the dirty, complicated belief that yours is a world awash in limitless sexual possibilities.
On Craigslist, you're surrounded not only by skeevy creeps and blurry penis photos but by oats-sowing bi-curious college girls; self-described "nice guys" with jobs and proper grammar and everything; lonely, MILFy housewives who need just a bit more attention and cunnilingus than they're currently getting.
Amid the comical weirdos are people who say terribly normal-sounding things, like, "I am a 27-year-old woman, just looking for a nice stud that isn't into the drama and bullshit. Please be able to carry on a conversation and have a sense of humor if you reply to this." Or, "Looking for that special gal no strings attached, like to have intimate talks be straightforward who is a good listener knows what she wants and enjoys a good massage not afraid to go all the way."
Craigslist, with its insistently plain-wrap appearance, is the lowest-commitment option in an already low-commitment endeavor, so Casual Encounters' setup achieves a sort of harmonious equilibrium with the mindset of its users. There's no registration, no fees, no pop-ups, no banners. Just lines and lines of ads, listing the multitudes of people willing to fuck you.
But is it really that easy?
L.A. Weekly followed four people, one from each of the four major categories — w4m, m4w, w4w, m4m — in their search for that elusive, NSA encounter.
M4W: A Seller's Market
"Looking for a cute girl, age 20-50, for a fun, casual sexual encounter. And, yes, I will spank you. Nothing crazy. I don't have whips or a dungeon. I don't humiliate. Just my open hand. (And a pair of handcuffs.) I'm a handsome guy, 40, 5 feet 11 inches, nice eyes, beard, a little burly, work out 3-4 times per week, and I clean up real nice, as they say. Send a photo, I'll send you mine."
Terence's spanking offer might have narrowed the field, but then again, the field is always narrow for men who are seeking women, and even ads that aren't seeking anything exotic tend not to get a lot of replies. In the personals, it's women who run the show.
Terence received a whopping total of nine responses. Of those, eight were spam. These were identifiable by their extremely generic nature, typically something like, "Hey I liked your ad. I'm on Yahoo Messenger right now! Send me a message at HotGirl2271!" Replying to these inevitably leads the user to a paid porn site.
But one smelled like it might be human: "Hi! could you please send few pics? clearly showing your face and body? thanks! Debra." This was accompanied by a sunlit photo of an attractive blonde with a perky smile.
Cautiously optimistic, Terence sent a response, including a picture. The blonde replied, "Thanks for the pic ... i thought you would look younger. do you have other pics?"
"What was I supposed to say to that?" Terence asks, his eyes rolling skyward with exasperation. Already realizing odds were against him, Terence threw in the towel, retorting, "Sorry, honey, that's as young as I get."
When asked why he didn't work particularly hard to continue the established contact, by, say, inviting the blonde out for coffee, Terence gripes, "I'm fucking sick of 'coffee.' I can't tell you how much fucking 'coffee' I've had through all the Internet dating sites I've been on over the years. The only thing I'd meet up for is if she wants to take her clothes off today."
The hard lesson most men learn on Craigslist: Because they outnumber women by about 20 to 1 on Casual Encounters, men aren't something to be desired. They're something to be weeded out — even guys like Terence, who are attractive and well-educated.
Would he try Craigslist again?
"I might read women's ads, but placing my own was a total waste of time."
"No two-minute wonders need apply. Very youthful, very curvy 41-year-old in Santa Monica seeks very youthful, preferably young, attractive baby-faced man for casual encounters (hopefully plural!). By the way, replies without pics will not be considered. Thanks!"
On Craigslist, women can be this flat-out demanding and not be dismissed as bitches but get plenty of play. Clarissa's ad, for example, got more than 150 responses.
The sexually adventurous, curly-haired brunette isn't averse to casual hookups. The responses started coming in immediately.
"That was exciting," she says. "Basically, I spent from about 3:30, when I placed the ad, until 9 p.m., when I got tired of reading and responding to messages. Then I got more and more replies, and had fun responding, and considered meeting someone. But then I got bored, and the only one that was really interesting has been reticent."
Her initial ardor cooled, and in the end, Clarissa didn't meet up with even one of her potential sack mates.
What went wrong? "Later that evening, I started to think about all the terrible things that could happen with something like this," she says. The rising fears that dampened her heat ran the gamut: "Getting killed. Getting disappointed. Wasting my time. Jeopardizing my health and my business. Being rejected. Getting emotionally hurt by some thoughtless, shallow swinger with herpes who makes some 'they're not exactly perky' comment about my breasts while expecting me to agree and fuck him anyway."
This is the bell curve many Casual Encounters advertisers travel: initially enticed by the fantasy, but eventually put off by the reality. The fear of mishaps and the heaps of unsolicited penis photos, the TMI, the STDs join forces to make the briefly hot idea of an NSA encounter quickly turn cold.
If you're wondering why that sexy chick suddenly quit answering your e-mails, this sort of rational thought process is probably the reason.
M4M: Easy Street
Gay men are always on the vanguard of any of society's sexual shifts, for good or ill, from HIV to Grindr, and Josh sees Craigslist as antiquated. He hooked up online as recently as last week, but not via Craigslist. He checks the site from time to time, but, "In reality, I haven't had sex through Craigslist for years and years and years."
With his swimmer's body, unblemished, caramel-colored skin and engaging, lighthearted, party-party personality, this resident of an Elle Decor–worthy West Hollywood apartment is clearly a desirable specimen. Josh is in a committed relationship, but his partner has a job that forces him to travel out of town frequently; even when his boyfriend is home, his sex drive simply doesn't match Josh's.
So Josh looks online for casual hookups often, and has no trouble finding them. However, he's largely left Craigslist behind. "It's like that Margaret Cho joke, where she calls Craigslist 'the PennySaver of sex,' " he says. "If you're a gay man, and you have to resort to Craigslist, maybe it's time to re-evaluate."
Josh prefers a number of other sites to the creaky Craigslist, such as Adam4Adam, BarebackRT (with its high proportion of users who, like himself, are HIV-positive) or his favorite, Manhunt. Manhunt works because its interface has something that Craigslist has stubbornly refused to add: thumbnail photos. "It's faster. Twenty pictures, 20 guys. You decide on two to three options per page, and you click."
Josh adds that no site has eliminated the flake factor, which is ubiquitous in the online world. The other big problem: people exaggerating their attractiveness with dated or miraculously flattering photos.
"One time I opened the door, and it was this huge guy. Not saying that fat people can't have sex, but it's the lying that got me. So I said, 'I'm sorry, I gotta go, it's not going to work.' It's very awkward, but it pisses me off." So Josh closed the door in the face of a hopeful prospect.
Despite the risks, Josh says he'd still choose Craigslist over the bar scene.
"Meeting in bars is too intimate. I don't want to spend money in a bar. I don't want to make myself cute. I don't want small talk, trying to be charming and seductive. It's a lot more effort. On a website, you go straight to the point. I'm looking for someone with no strings attached, one and done. I cannot get involved, because I'm in a relationship. The only thing I want is to have sex."
One benefit of the rise in online sex: Josh concludes that it's made the West Hollywood bar scene a lot more enjoyable.
"Now, people just go to have fun with friends. This idea of going to a bar for sex, very few people do that. Even if you're horny as hell."
W4W: No U-Haul Needed
"Hello ladies, I'm looking for: friends with benefits, casual dating, or a hot onetime hookup, with a sexy, healthy, vivacious woman. I love all races and genders (butch fem, trans or intersex is all good), and I like you pretty, damn good-looking, or super sexy and comfortable in your own skin (or hair, or shoes, or undies ...). To avoid any misunderstanding — I am looking for a WOMAN ONLY. No men, and no male-and-female couples. If you ignore this clause, I will do mean things with your e-mail address. I look forward to meeting! Hugs and kisses!"
Grace, 5 feet 9 and 130 pounds, is a gorgeous girl, so if anyone is going to be doing the turning down, it's her. Still, despite her warnings, a number of men replied to Grace's ad, maybe because they were enticed by the shots she included from her occasional modeling jobs, or maybe because they thought to themselves, "Sure, she's seeking a woman, but wait till she sees this JPEG of my fabulous schlong!" Or — most likely — they're simply replying without reading, embodying some perfect, dated Cathy Guisewite stereotype of the hearing-impaired boor.
After wading through a small stack of e-mails and meeting up with one woman whom she didn't find attractive, Grace moved her ad from Casual Encounters to Women Seeking Women, Craigslist's more traditional dating section. It was only then that she became the only one of our test subjects to lay some rubber on the road.
After a few IMs and text messages, Grace invited one woman to her apartment to meet in person, and soon after found her long legs tangled in a new friend's hair. "It went great! She's gorgeous and sweet. Had a good connection and she spent the night. We didn't sleep much. Good sex."
Things only became unclear afterward, when the woman wanted to hit it again and Grace demurred.
"She called and said, 'Do you want to come over tonight?' but I said I needed to get some work done. If it's a onetime thing, that's fine, but I don't connect emotionally if I have sex right away. Even though she's hot, she's pretty, and she's cute, I was just a little bit disconnected. So I think I'd rather see her again as more than just a booty call and make sure I knew how I was feeling about it."
Clearly the antithesis of the "U-Haul lesbian," Grace has another potential date from Casual Encounters still pending. "She's a musician, I saw her YouTube video, she's clearly hot, and we're going to meet up when she gets back into town next week."
The anonymity the online world offers is two-faced. Its beautiful face is the one that lets you shed your inhibitions and finally proclaim to the world that your ultimate fulfillment would consist of being tied up with rubber hoses while wearing pink satin panties. On the ugly side, anonymity emboldens cyberbullies, angry at you, perhaps because you have dared to voice their own repressed desires right out loud. The flake factor is overwhelming. There are the dreaded "endless e-mails," the looky-loos, the photo collectors and the perverts — a label that typically describes anyone not into the same things that you are.
Craigslist may seem to magically put scores of potential fuck buddies at your fingertips, but it doesn't magically get you over your self-esteem issues, your time crunch, your weight problem, your fear of STDs or those pesky ethics.
In reality, the chasm between the moment when, as you sit comfortably in front of your computer, your idle thoughts stray to "Boy, some head would sure be nice right about now" and actually procuring said head is always far vaster and more difficult to traverse than we like to imagine.
Do people get laid through Craigslist? Sure. But after wading through the dregs, it quickly becomes obvious that your odds are scarcely better there than they are anywhere else.
Not bad, but you just use http://getlaid.us/
it helps me to find some better local picks than CL...
As this article testifies, the Internet has done little or nothing to help hetero men find no-strings-attached free sex because the vast majority of hetero women are not into that lifestyle. A straight guy's chances of finding casual sex online are probably worse than in bars -- which are also overrated because who wants to watch a film or TV show where a guy strikes out in a bar and has to go home and jerk off ? Sadly, life is only like "Sex in the City" if you have a vagina or are attracted to men. I don't care how good-looking or how big a hetero guy's penis is, unless he's rich and/or famous he's eventually going to realize that he's going to have to break the law like I did (in California at least) and hire prostitutes if he wants to have sex with many women. I'm in my 50s and have had intercourse with hundreds of women, but I can count the ones I didn't pay for outright on one hand (and I'm not overweight or below-average in looks or height).
Interesting article! London UK male here, mid 30's, very high drive and open tendencies (damn, starting to sound like one of the more boring ads now!)
Right, a bit of advice - set up a separate email address simply for craigslist, especially men, due to the overwhelming amount of spam replies purveying yet another fake dating site. Be very sure when sending pictures that the recipient is genuine - something like a rough location in your city or a keyword to be used in their reply usually weeds out the scammers from the shaggers! The scammers will steal the pictures, especially from ladies, and use them to set up fake profiles on their fake dating sites.
Don't be downhearted if you do not get a reply, especially men, as the man/woman ration is very high. Think about it - in the real world the men typically make the first move.
Ok, I am currently having a casual thing with a girl a bit younger than me and it is pretty damn good from both sides (her ad). We are looking for a 3some. 3 weeks ago I linked up with a rather wealthy couple and gave a bit of head to the Sierra Leonian woman while her man watched (their ad). Unfortunately they took a bit too much nose powder and in a rare move so did I! Was a fun night though!
I have met two transsexuals and had a few fun encounters with them (their ads). A few years back I had a long term friends with benefits with a slightly older secondary school teacher (her ad). I have also done it will a small number of guys (some my ad, some theirs) - I enjoyed it a lot but would never want a boyfriend!!! Years back I met someone for no strings, (my ad), we didn't have sex but are still very good friends and laugh at how we met!
Met someone for a date at the end of last year (my ad) we got on perfectly (her words), unfortunately we are the same height and she likes guys much much taller (boo hoo!). Another secondary school teacher came to mine (my ad), we didn't have sex, I think she would have eaten me alive to be honest!!!
Have been looking for a relationship with a bit of an unusual twist, nothing perverted but something I might get slapped for if I asked a stranger in a chat up line. Met a girl for a drink on this one (my ad), we chat on the phone and like each other but both too busy to take a partnership further as of yet.
I'm a white guy and am only attracted to black girls/guys which narrows my candidates a little but I have had quite a bit of fun. I try to be genuine in my intentions, but the list works if you can handle a bit of rejection and a sift through the junk. Not gonna tell you my secret though, I'm an ok looker but it takes a bit more than just being tall, big, wealthy and successful to connect here you know! ;)
Have a look, have fun, and be bloody conscious out there!
SOMEONE I AM AN AQUAINTANCE WITH POSTED A PHOTO OF ME WITHOUT MY KNOWLEDGE. I HAVE NO IDEA WHERE ON CRAIG'S LIST HE POSTED IT. I HAVE AN EVIL X FATHER IN LAW WHOM SENT ME AN EMAIL IN REFERNCE TO IT BUT OF COURSE, WITH NO REFERNCE TO THE DIRECT LINK. IS THERE ANY WAY TO FIND IT?I READ UP ON THIS AND IT IS ILLEGAL.
If you are looking for a fun time tonight then you may want to try out find sex. This website has lots of men and women who just want to hook up. When you get started with the site you can create a personal profile to let everyone know what you are all about. http://www.findsex.org/findsex...
I posted in the w4m casual encounters section and got flagged later that day. My platonic post was also flagged, though that one lasted 2 days. Both posts had pics and had a written description of myself, and what I was looking for.
For the nsa post, I got a few interesting replies but some turned out to be kinda creepy/stalkerish. One potential guy I was giddy to meet but in the end, it turned me off from craigslist. He seemed too good to be true in the beginning: respectful, fairly in shape, non-clingy, able to carry a convo, interesting. While scanning the m4w casual encounters section, I came across an ad with his photo but with different age and location details. For the following few days, he continued to post, changing his age/location each time.
The conclusion that I came to after my experiences with craigslist is that it's a waste of time. Too many flakes, creeps, fakes, spam. When ridiculously horny, don't rely on craigslist.
Well Craiglist does not have any of that anymore, good thing they cleaned that up, they need to clean it up some more, and stop leting people flag people. Craigslist is a big joke now.
I have met tons of girls on CL for NSA sex.. Sure it takes a little work and time but doesn't everything.
Casual Sex? Music to my ears http://tinyurl.com/6yy5n84
For Casual sex I just go to LAxOutcall.com With the artificial poon-shortage there is a real market for working girls in LA
that is exactly the reason prostitutes are necessary in any society.
women are extremely selective about casual sex partners. they have such high standards that most men just cannot meet. im not blaming them, its their preference.
but i hope society acknowledges this uneven playing field and start accepting paid sex as a normal sexual outlet for single men, as long as they dont settle down.
As a gay male, I firmly believe that Josh, your poster-by gay, needs a man-to-man. Josh apparently thinks that if both he and his HIV+, it's OK to Bareback. He's dead wrong. A HIV virus accurately replicates itself about 2/3 of the time. The other 1/3 are mutants. As a result HIV comes in thousands of different strains. Josh did not reveal which meds he uses to control his HIV, but every time he barebacks with someone else, he invites all sorts of weird HIV strains into his body - strains that are either immune to his meds, or strains that produce med-resistant strains. He passes his lethal cocktail of HIV strains on to every man he barebacks. I am also confused about Josh's "committed" relationship with his boyfriend. How can you be "committed" if you are cheating all the time? Does Josh's "committed" boy friend know what's going on? Maybe Josh's behavior is a the real reason his partner is not "in the mood." I don't care how drop dead gorgeous Josh is. I wouldn't have sex with him even if he were the last gay man on earth. Man up, Josh. Right now, you are as a great a threat to the gay community as homophobic maniac running around with a Glock .40.
Going on CL is like playing Russian Roulette, but it's essentially no different than any other dating site or off line dating these days. As for finding someone online: on Match.com and other sites people post old photos, lie about their age (to show up in younger age boxes in searches), lie about their weight, height, relationship status, job, income, education, you name it.
One recent study showed that 1/3 of people on dating sites are attached: married or in a committed relationship and so obviously should not have an active profile.
Then there are the weirdos, the violent, the STD infected, the addicts (sex, booze, drugs, food, gambling). And if you get around to that first awkward coffeedate: there are the ones on or off their meds, the stoned ones, the ones with bad banners, the ones with body odor and bad breath, the bad dressers, and so on.
Everyone is Facebooking and Googling prospective dates to dig up dirt or just to check out info - some even pay for a background check. But a background check or a a Google search most likely will not tell you if a man/woman is a psycho, a serial cheater, has a spouse and two kids somewhere, has STDs, is on meds, etc.
So boys and girls: it's a total crap shoot. Have fun!
I just got a $949.95 Sony laptop (17 inch) for $127.32 and if you think that's an awesome deal, my neighbor is getting a massive 52 inch HDTV for only $176.84 being delivered to his house tomorrow. It feels great not to pay high retail prices like the rest of people have to. I am even selling some of the stuff back to my co-workers making 10 times my money back. I use two sites, both are good, WikiBidZ.çomand SwipeBay.çom
Pure nastiness, feel for you. I believe there is a way that Google can remove such illegally posted pictures.
A lot of dating sites are stealing pics from sites like craigslist to set up fake profiles so contact google and ask them for help if c/l cant
you make some valid points about that guy Josh. it's one thing to be horny and want to get your nut off and an entirely different thing to be dishonest with your supposed "partner". i am guilty of occasionally reading some of the ads on CL, but all i can think of is that with my luck i will wander into some kind of set up or scam and return home with nothing but a filed police report. when it comes to sex on the internet, if it looks too good to be true, it nearly always ends up being so in reality. do these folks really believe this is the way grown ups arrange to have sex with one another? as with anything else in life, if you want something worthwhile it almost always requires that you invest some time and more than likely a bit of effort and dare i say it - hard work. there are no shortcuts unless you are the one in a million that wins the lotto. and even those people can end up miserable!
@Paul Smithfield Awesome! Thanks for the tip. I bought a burrito today for $4.29 at ATacoStand.InEastLos dot com