iPhilandering: It's Easy to Be Sleazy!

When You Need: To call it quits

Download: Scribe, an iPhone app that provides form letters for every occasion, including breakups. After sending a Scribe-penned dump note saying your fling is finito, flick over to Scribe's "Apologies" section. You'll need it.

When You Need: To thwart a jilted lover

Download: Sex Offender Tracker. Few breakups manage to skirt messiness, and let's face it, your situation was messy from the start. If trying to do the right thing and get your original relationship back on track throws your paramour into a tizzy, keep tabs on the psycho before he goes all Rape Bear on you. This app gets added street cred courtesy of viral video star Antoine Dodson, of "Hide your kids, hide your wife, and hide your husbands 'cause they rapin' everybody out here" fame.

When You Need: To atone for your sins

Download: GirlfriendKeeper, an app that can help you look like you've turned over a new leaf by paying more attention to your almost-lost love. The app sends automated text messages at preset intervals, and the messages range from the simple and sweet ("I miss you" ) to the borderline-stalkerish ("Your birthday is in just 261 days ..."). Just don't forget to turn it off when you're together and she can plainly see that you're busy doing something other than noticing the color of her eyes or calculating how many hours it's been since your first date.

When You Need: To try a new approach

Download: Polyamory Weekly, the nonmonogamy relationship app. Hell, it might be worth a go. This app features the Polyamory Weekly podcast, in which host Miss Poly Manners, the Emily Post of poly, answers thorny etiquette questions like, "I have three partners and each of them has at least one other partner of their own. How on earth do we decide who gets to sit next to whom when several of us go out to eat together?" Ah, la dolce vita! If only the rest of us could have "problems" like these!