I SCREAM. YOU SCREAM. WE ALL SCREAM AND SCREAM SOME MORE

Whatever happened to clean, wholesome Halloween fun, like leaving bits of glass in the punch bowl? Knott's 37 Annual Halloween Haunt opens more than a month early, and the people behind the nearly two dozen attractions spread across 160-acres must've been bullied a lot as children. Three scare zones; six shows with names like The Hanging and Professor Freak's Funhouse; and 13 new and old mazes made to look like a prison, dollhouse and even a corn field that may or may not be inhabited by a religious children's cult that worships a demonic entity called "He Who Walks Behind the Rows." That's a lot of numbers. And don't forget all the actors dressed as monsters waiting to jump in front of you and yell "Boo!" Unlike street mimes, you don't have permission to smack them. Save it for the carolers.
Sept. 24-Oct. 31, 7 p.m.-1 a.m., 2009

 
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