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Setting the (Gay) Wedding Table

Wiser, more diffuse, battle-savvy gay-rights groups craft a 2010 ballot measure for California

At 7 p.m. on a clear, balmy night in West Hollywood, the gym bunnies, drag queens, high school and college students, power gays, lipstick lesbians, middle-aged activists, blue jean–wearing bears and assorted gay friendlies had gathered once again. The nighttime rally on May 26 was the last, soul-aching event of a day filled with press conferences and protests, where gay-rights leaders and their straight allies denounced the California Supreme Court’s ruling that upheld Proposition 8 and finally banned, without question, gay marriage in the Golden State.

“We come from a stock of people who have been thrown down but are ready to get up and fight — again and again and again,” West Hollywood City Councilman John Duran yelled into a microphone as he stood on a flatbed truck parked in the middle of San Vicente Boulevard near the Pacific Design Center.

The crowd of several thousand people clapped and cheered, and then Lt. Dan Choi, who had recently been discharged from the Army because he came out as a gay man on national television, took the mike, declaring, “I’m a soldier! And love is worth fighting for!”

Newspaper photographers aimed their cameras and snapped away, radio reporters held up their microphones, TV-news cameramen shot as much coverage as they could, and print journalists and bloggers scribbled in their notebooks or tapped on BlackBerries. The heart-wrenching scene, where gay and lesbian couples held each other tightly, some with children sitting on their shoulders, looked like past sad nights following gay-rights losses. But whether people knew it or not, something much larger was playing out before the crowd and press — a new campaign to pass a pro–gay marriage ballot measure in California was making its prime-time debut.

From celebrities Drew Barrymore and Kathy Griffin, who stepped up to the microphone on the flatbed, to a married gay couple sharing their story about raising an adopted son, to Los Angeles Mayor Antonio Villaraigosa, speaking in Spanish to the Latino community, to the Rev. Eric Lee of the Southern Christian Leadership Council of Los Angeles, offering prayer and support, the rallies and press conferences unfolding throughout L.A. on the same day were a well-orchestrated single event meant to reach out to California voters and to set the table for a gay-marriage victory at the ballot box in 2010 or 2012.

“You need to talk to people’s compassion and empathy,” says Darry Sragow, a respected Democratic consultant in Los Angeles, “so the best spokespeople for this kind of campaign are gays and lesbians and their straight friends and family.”

The coordinated effort in West Hollywood and throughout California, including a gay-marriage summit of sorts in conservative, farming-oriented Fresno on May 30, showcased the kind of campaign structure many gay-marriage advocates want to see built for the new ballot measure, in which cash-rich, mainstream gay-rights organizations work closely with their less wealthy grass-roots counterparts.

“The campaign will be wildly different from the last time around,” says Torie Osborn, former executive director of the Los Angeles Gay & Lesbian Center and co-founder of Camp Courage, a training seminar for grass-roots activists that’s been traveling around the state. “It will unleash this growing, and huge, grass-roots effort.”

But things aren’t all smiles and sunshine in the gay-rights world in California. Hard feelings from the “No on 8” campaign’s failures still linger in the gay-rights movement, and very different grass-roots and mainstream organizations, such as Equality California and Courage Campaign, are jockeying for a better position so they can ensure themselves a seat at the campaign’s power table. Activists of all stripes differ on what kind of political pro should be tapped to actually run the campaign.

And, while all of this has been playing out, a little-known gay-rights group based in politically savvy Sacramento has suddenly become a major power broker — by very cleverly and very quietly filing the first official ballot language for a pro–gay marriage measure for 2010.

“We really see ourselves as moderators of the situation,” says Chaz Lowe of Sacramento, co-founder of a brash new group that is taking action without waiting for the old guard — Yes on Equality. “That way, there doesn’t have to be infighting between Equality California and the Courage Campaign.”

The gym bunnies, bears, drag queens, power gays and lipstick lesbians in West Hollywood and California want a winning campaign to restore their legal right to marry. Some of them may not closely follow the inside moves of their own civil rights movement, but what unfolds now is critical. The decisions made in the coming weeks, and the leaders who emerge, will lay the foundation for the defeat or victory of a pro–gay marriage ballot measure.

 

Robin McGehee, a plain-talking, hard-charging lesbian and mother of two, typifies the new grass-roots movement in California’s gay-rights struggle. A 35-year-old college professor in Fresno, McGehee married her longtime partner when it was still legal and threw herself into the anti–Proposition 8 cause. After she spoke at a “No on 8” rally in her hometown last fall, Roman Catholic church officials took away her position as president of the parent-teacher association at her son’s Catholic elementary school.

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  • Robin Tyler 06/09/2009 10:37:00 PM

    As an activist in the LGBT movement since the 1970s, I for one feel very lucky that Equality California had the foresight to bring us the person who has had more success than anyone in the country in winning and protecting marriage equality. Marc Solomon, Equality California�s new marriage director, led the campaign in Massachusetts, then lent his talents to help out in Connecticut and Vermont. I think we can all agree that is a track record we can learn a lot from. I�ve had the chance to work with Marc and some of the field organizers that EQCA has brought on board. He is terrific and has put together a terrific team. After Proposition 8 passed, I co-organized the town hall meeting in Los Angeles to discuss what went wrong and how it could have been done better. I also wrote several articles on the fight against Proposition 8, as my wife and I were original plaintiffs to file the first lawsuit in the case that brought marriage equality to California. I have seen EQCA really listen to those of us who felt left out, and EQCA has implemented many of our suggestions. They have hired grass roots activists as field team organizers. They have produced 2 great television commercials, using a lesbian couple and a gay couple. They have reached out to find the 18,000 married same-sex couples to help spearhead, along with our allies, a grassroots movement to repeal Prop. 8. So, why is there still such animosity? Torie Osborn did not work to defeat Proposition 8. (She was working to elect President Obama). This is fine, but having made no contribution to defeat Proposition 8, why is she still raging and attacking Equality California? I co-produced (all volunteer) 17 PSA's called "stop the hate, no on 8." They were not used by the campaign, but many of us who tried to contribute to the campaign, are not steeped in this continuous anger, hatred and attack mode. EQCA and the other people involved with No on 8, are still our allies. To continue attacking them, is not only counter-productive , but disingenuous and frankly, becoming disgraceful. Escalating 'the battle within', when most of us have moved on, will only benefit the other side when we go back on the ballot. However, in the history of movements, a lot of people have tried to advance to a leadership position by stepping on and over the bodies of those who should be their allies. There is actually a name for it. It is called horizontal hostility. The last thing we should be doing right now is self-righteous name-calling. Remember that equality California and its leaders have a long history of advancing key rights and protections for LGBT people, more than we have in any other state. So let�s all move on and put our efforts toward fighting to bring marriage equality back to California. Robin Tyler, plaintiff in CA Supreme Court Marriage Case , petitioner in CA Supreme Court Case to overturn proposition 8, co founder of www.dayofdecision.com

  • Dan Cohen 06/09/2009 1:32:00 AM

    I was surprised to read how your paper characterized the battles in Massachusetts to protect same-sex marriage. The reporter used words like �simple,� �predictable,� and �manageable.� After a battle is won it is easy to claim the results were inevitable. But as a Boston-based political consultant who for years was in the thick of the marriage battles in Massachusetts, I can assure you that nothing could be further from the truth. When the Massachusetts courts ruled in favor of equal marriage rights more than five years ago (for the first time in the history of the country), the reaction was as swift as it was fierce, particularly from the Catholic Church which had held sway over Massachusetts politics for many years, the religious right, and Governor Mitt Romney. The public was evenly divided, much in the same way that the public in California is divided today: 47 percent supported a constitutional amendment to take eliminate equal marriage rights with 47 percent opposed. Against the odds (and contrary to the expectations of most political pundits), MassEquality, led by Marc Solomon (now marriage director for Equality California), put together the smartest, most powerful campaign that I have ever witnessed � one which shifted public opinion across Massachusetts dramatically. The centerpiece of the campaign was a focus on gay and lesbian people telling their stories and connecting with voters at their doors, over the airwaves, and everywhere else. The results speak for themselves: today, 62 percent of voters oppose an anti-equality amendment, a shift of 15 percentage points, and a constitutional amendment is � for all practical purposes � dead. This campaign was successful across the diverse demography of Massachusetts; in working class industrial communities; in majority Portuguese cities; in Irish and Italian-Catholic enclaves; and communities of color. California and Massachusetts are certainly different places and there are always unique elements to any campaign. But there is no question that the principles employed by MassEquality and Marc Solomon to change public opinion on marriage are not unique to one state � they will work well in the diverse communities of California just as they did in the diverse communities of the northeast. Dan Cohen, President, Connection Strategies

  • Petes 06/07/2009 7:13:00 AM

    As for the idea that passage of Prop 8 was a "right wing" thing, we need to keep in mind that it was supported here in L.A. by a lot of different demos - including some very, shall we say, non-right wing ones. The LAT had a map that showed this pretty dramatically.

  • John Henning 06/07/2009 6:00:00 AM

    To the Editor: Several comments in the article underplay the significance of what was accomplished in Massachusetts, and imply that political campaign skills gained in that state by people like EQCA�s Marc Solomon aren�t transferrable to a state as �big� and �complex� as California. The fact is that when the marriage battle was waged in Massachusetts, same-sex marriage was an extraordinarily contentious, emotional and complicated issue, just as it is in California now. We have a lot to learn from that experience, and from those who lived it. The Massachusetts Supreme Court ruled in 2004, almost four years before the California Supreme Court did, at a time when gay marriage was considered a radical concept and was barely taken seriously in most of the country. When the court ruled, same-sex marriage activists (including Solomon) had only about 50 of 200 state legislators on their side, and they faced a hostile electorate itching to vote on the question. In the space of three years, these activists achieved the impossible � tripling the number of pro-equality legislators to 150, and thereby forever protecting marriage from a voter initiative. In the process, they transformed the way an entire state thought about gays and lesbians and their aspiration to simply be just like everyone else. The Massachusetts activists accomplished this feat not just by going to the legislators in their offices, but by going to the voters who put them in office. It took a combination of smarts, shoe leather, and just plain guts, sustained over a period of years. (I witnessed this first hand, having spent two years making a film about the Massachusetts struggle.) Here in California, the names and faces may have changed, but the job is the same: We have to go to people�s doors and explain to them why marriage matters, to them and to us. Few people in the country have done that successfully on a large scale, and we in California are lucky to have some of them � including Solomon � in our midst. John Henning Los Angeles

  • Patrick Range McDonald 06/07/2009 3:35:00 AM

    Thanks for all of your comments. It's good not only for me, but I know various gay leaders also read them. It's important for them to know what people are thinking. Harvey Milk's name is often tossed around during these kinds of debates, etc. I suggest people read the excellent Randy Shilts book, "The Mayor of Castro Street," to better understand the man and his mission, which was clearly bigger than himself. The gay community can also learn effective political and public relations strategies. Take care, Patrick

  • News Editor 06/06/2009 9:47:00 PM

    Actually, the article uses the phrase "same-sex" about as often as it uses the term "gay marriage." You'll notice that some of the leading advocates quoted use the term "gay marriage." These folks are fighting heart and soul for this right, and are putting in hundreds if not thousands of hours for this cause, and THEY are using the term "gay marriage." -- The news editor

  • Kurt M. 06/06/2009 8:20:00 PM

    It's very disturbing that such a lengthy article doesn't even once correctly name its subject matter. Can you explain to me what a "gay marriage" is? Because I know plenty of same-sex couples who are married to each other and not a single one of them is in a "gay marriage". They're in a marriage. Period. There is no such thing as a "gay marriage". There is only marriage. We're not fighting for "gay marriage". We're fighting for marriage. Are bisexual couples supposed to be in "gay" marriages, too? Or couples where one or both partners are transgender? This is not a trivial point, this is the entire point. What we're going to establish in California is marriage equality so that all eligible couples have the freedom to marry. That's it. To call it anything else -- anything it is not -- is to deliberately play into anti-equality propaganda.

  • Rob 06/06/2009 1:23:00 AM

    This article unfairly criticizes Equality California. Geoff Kors did not run the No on 8 campaign. People need to understand that before they go running their mouths. There needs coalition of groups fighting to repeal Prop 8, not a big clash of egos.

  • Sabrina 06/05/2009 11:33:00 PM

    Two quick corrections about the article. On Sunday there were only about 400 people. And on Saturday, at Meet in the Middle, Robin McGehee pointed to a banner (not a gay flag) which had over 30 logos of grassroots organizations who contributed to making the Fresno rally happen (btw there were way over 3000 people). When she pointed at that banner and said, "that�s how you win in 2010" she was referring to the combined efforts of everyday people (otherwise known as grassroots) which created Meet in the Middle 4 Equality.

  • Miki Jackson 06/05/2009 11:06:00 PM

    A truly excellent article that illustrates the vital role the "fourth estate" plays in political and civic life. Patrick really distills and focuses on the issues and situations facing those of us who want to regain out civil rights here in California. We have been dehumanized and turned into political footballs while becoming the most profitable fund raising scapegoats the right wing has. These power trips and money battles of people like Kors and the Gay and Lesbian Center's Lori Jean are something we just can't afford anymore. The cost of serving their petty egos is just too high, in both human misery and scarce dollars. They need to, as an old and wise friend used to say "get their egos in order" and become team players and we need to get moving and keep their roles to a useful level. The most productive way to fight for rights would have been to go for emploment discrimination since that's the one that American's most easily support. I still think that along with all the good hard smart work that was put into defeating prop 6, it's employment discrimination core had a lot to do with it's loss. At heart, red blooded Americans want everyone to have a job, maybe not marry, serve in the military or smooch in public, but, by god, work. If we had been able to build a large base getting that right in place first it would be uch easier make more organiztional sense to use that to obtain the harder to get goals like civil marriage and military civil rights. Time and tide did not allow for that and now we have fight on the battlefield we are in. we have to be smart and we have to fight for our rights, not have to deal with problems of which organization gets the spotlight and the bucks.

  • Randy 06/05/2009 7:29:00 AM

    Re SETTING THE (GAY) WEDDING TABLE (LAW 06/04/09): This whole marriage debate is just pointless. If religious nuts and pro-family goons are upset at the prospect of gays having sex or relationships, they ought to be 100% in favor of gay marriage: there is NO better way to stop folks from having sex than to get them married off. As if their special marriage will even last. With divorce, adultery and abuse at an all-time high, marriage is already on the skids, gays or not. The right-wing's pet cause of traditional marriage is threatened much more by the constant parade of preachers and politicos getting busted for having doped-up sex with hustlers and children. And if any modern gay couple actually believes that their relationship will be validated/fulfilled/saved by a piece of paper or by taking archaic vows before a priest, they're no smarter than their breeder opponents. Couples can make a lifelong commitment to each other without even leaving home. If you need a ceremony, go to Burning Man for chrissakes. Legal issues, wills, tax breaks? Hire an attorney, sign contracts, create a joint living trust. Family won't accept your partner? Welcome to married life, pal. Bottom line: marriage is incompatible with human nature and should be banned by law, just as human slavery once was. Sheeesh. It's the twenty-first century already.

  • Bob 06/05/2009 4:24:00 AM

    I'm curious as to what experience, if any, Chaz Lowe has in organizing...anything. What is his prior experience in working for LGBT civil rights, and specifically, what is his prior experience in running or helping to run any kind of political campaign? He is not in the staff listing on the Yes on Equality website, whose other members' bios don't seem to list any political campaign experience either. Lots of rally-organizing, but a ballot initiative campaign is a MUCH different beast.

  • Dexter T 06/05/2009 3:23:00 AM

    The Yes! On Equality campaign has already begun a ballot initiative. Courage Campaign is mobilizing grassroots activists and holding events all across the state. Equality California is gathering donors and backing LGBT legislation. Marriage Equality USA seems to be holding effective demonstrations. There is a question that needs to be addressed: Are we ever going to merge our strengths, assets and powers together to form a huge front for re-instating marriage equality in California? As someone who worked on the No On Prop 8 campaign, a gay activist and regular attendee at various of the recent protests, I would immediately jump and dedicate my time and effort to a unified coalition for the common purpose. I am certain that many would as well. We need a single official campaign that brings together all of our organizations with a desire for an all-out effort to win in 2010 and an emphasis with not repeating the mistakes that we made before. I'm not going to accuse anyone of anything, but it seems to me (and probably to many others who are ready to repeal Prop 8) that our organizations are currently pushing different special interests and strategies, but share the same agenda. We should all not be trying to be the next Harvey Milk. We should be uniting into one front all across the state and gathering + utilizing all of our resources. Courage Campaign is widely perceived to be the most mobilized group with the most grassroots support. Activists like their appeal. Yes! On Equality has taken the step to acquire an official ballot initiative from the State of California, and Equality California seems to have the cash $$$$, as they are a well-established LGBT advocacy group and receive plenty of donations from the community. We need to combine these assets and get our work started. The first goal should be getting those ballot petition signatures completed by the deadline. Combine LGBT community activists, our straight allies, EQCA donors and members, and all of the other groups together with Courage Campaign's army of grassroots volunteers and mobilize across the state to get these ballot petitions signed. Events like Gay Pride, with their large turnouts would be essential places to start. Funding for our efforts should be provided by all of the organizations. Our opponents are very good at dividing and conquering people with fear and misinformation. Let's not divide ourselves because of our individual interests. We would surely fail again. We have to unite, form our multiple strategies, and announce a united coalition. Once formally announced, we can begin to identify and bring in all of our old and newly created supporters, combine them with our present supporters and begin our new fight for marriage equality in 2010. I'm no campaign strategist, but I do know what killed us in the 2008 election. One, we weren't honest about who we were. We didn't come out to California as Lesbians, Gays, Bisexuals and Transgender individuals who have our own relationships, committed partners, families and whose equal right to love and the pursuit of happiness to marriage was being taken away. We focused too much on the equal rights message and didn't come out to demonstrate who Prop 8 was hurting. Second, we ignored important groups of minority communities with tremendous voting power. We didn't reach out to the African American community. We barely, if at all reached out to the Latino community and most importantly, we didn't reach out to those who don't know us. Californians who don't personally know one of us were sold lies, adopted fears and either joined the ranks of our opposition or just voted against us. It is imperative that we address these mistakes this time around. Harvey Milk once said, "Gay brothers and sisters,... You must come out. Come out... to your parents... I know that it is hard and will hurt them but think about how they will hurt you in the voting booth! Come out to your relatives... come out to your friends... if indeed they are your friends. Come out to your neighbors... to your fellow workers... to the people who work where you eat and shop... come out only to the people you know, and who know you. Not to anyone else. But once and for all, break down the myths, destroy the lies and distortions. For your sake. For their sake. For the sake of the youngsters who are becoming scared by the votes from Dade to Eugene." In 1977 he said, "...I would like to see every gay doctor come out, every gay lawyer, every gay architect come out, stand up and let that world know. That would do more to end prejudice overnight than anybody would imagine. I urge them to do that, urge them to come out. Only that way will we start to achieve our rights." We need to be intelligent and logical about our strategies and we need to reserve our emotions and open identities for changing hearts, minds and winning voters. Many of our leaders say that we can defeat hate and fear with love. That love is going to win our battle. I agree. We all know that our love for one another is real and equally worthy of marriage, but we have to demonstrate and prove it. The first step however, is coming together in mass and only then can we come out, demonstrate our love and win equality. Learn from Harvey Milk's legacy.

  • Dexter T 06/05/2009 2:46:00 AM

    Myself and I'm sure a lot of other misplaced gays who want action (and bloody revenge) in 2010 want to know: Who is leading the efforts? There are way too many individual groups out there doing their own thing. Courage, EQCA, MEUSA, and Yes On Equality (who already has a 2010 ballot measure started). We need unity and a coalition! If we stay divided because every group wants to be the next Harvey Milk, we're going to get ours handed to us again. Anyone else? Allow me to elaborate: All of the groups are doing wonderful things. Courage is attracting the grassroots activists and putting out strong messages. Equality California seems to be tackling state legislation, sponsoring protests and (still) asking for donations, Marriage Equality USA is organizing sit ins at clerk's offices, Yes! On Equality has received an official green light form the State to start a 2010 ballot initiative and there are plenty of other groups out there with people. These are all positives, but WHY aren't we all coming together and combining our strengths + resources? We should also most definitely have community oversight this time. The community has to be part of the show so that we don't lose our focus. We absolutely cannot repeat the same mistakes, ignore crucial voters and ignore that we are gays, lesbians, bisexuals and transfenders. We have to be honest to our voters about our families and how Prop 8 hurt us. No hiding behind obscure messages. Harvey Milk wouldn't have it any other way. I can assure you that our community is still galvanized and our movement has momentum. We can accomplish so much together. We share the common purpose. NOW is the time. Lets take a page from Harvey Milk. That is my challenge to the leaders of our organizations. No A-Gay bureaucracy. Unity.

  • Aj Kruth 06/04/2009 11:03:00 PM

    Just to correct the crowd numbers you reported for the anti-same-sex marriage rally in Fresno on Sunday, see the Fresno Bee link below. You obviously quoted the organizers of the event (or other news sources who did), but Fresno police estimated 1,000 on the high side, and 300-600 on the low side. Fresno police estimated Meet in the Middle on Saturday with between 2500-3000. http://www.facebook.com/ext/share.php?sid=94337476626&h=Lb5U8&u=f-OUB&ref=nf

  • Carol Hopkins 06/04/2009 10:50:00 PM

    Clearly people are clueless about how campaigns are run. Geoff Kors did not make the final decision on anything. There was a consulting firm and a campaign manager and a statewide field director. Those are the folks people should be angry with. Geoff was one of around 20 of the Executive Committee. And if folks wanted to go to doors, they should have volunteered earlier in the campaign so there would have been time to go to the doors. Anytime I went phonebanking, there were 30 or less folks volunteering...not enough to win!! So incredibly tired of the blame game folks - we are ALL in the same boat, start rowing!

 

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