It's safe to say that Gene Simmons never slept with Lisa Lampanelli. On the recent roast of Simmons on A&E, the comedian and Queen of Mean asked: "What do you call a man who's a true rock & roll icon? What do you call a man whose songs will live forever in the hearts of millions of fans? What do you call a man who's inspired countless young people to pursue their dream of making a difference in the world? You call that man John Lennon. But he's dead, and all we have is this untalented windbag." Don't let her read my eulogy.
Aug. 22-23, 9 p.m., 2008