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Cherry Bomb: Carrie Borzillo-Vrenna's Ultimate How-To for Budding Rock Chicks

Mrs. Chris Vrenna has composed a tome for women who fancy their boys scrawny, not brawny

Being a “rock chick” doesn’t necessarily have anything to do with being in a band, or writing about them, or even screwing guys who are in one. But doing so can give you special insight. L.A.-based entertainment journalist/rocker wife Carrie Borzillo-Vrenna knows all about it, and in her new book, Cherry Bomb: The Ultimate Guide to Becoming a Better Flirt, a Tougher Chick, and a Hotter Girlfriend, and to Living Life Like a Rock Star, she and her plucky pals and idols spill their secrets in shameless detail, with bits and tips about how to not only indulge in the sex, drugs and rock & roll fantasy, but how to turn it into a lifestyle.

(Click to enlarge)

Advice from the author: Pinch a stranger’s butt and walk away.

This is a tome for women who fancy their boys scrawny rather than brawny, prefer black nails over French tips, and who, like moi, grew up wanting to be Pinky Tuscadero (or her li’l sister, Leather) from Happy Days. That pop-culture reference too ancient? Try these, then: Beth Ditto, not Miley Cyrus ... The Donnas, not Danity Kane ... Diablo Cody, not Paris Hilton ... Emily the Strange, not Hello Kitty. Actually, scratch the last one, H.K. kinda rocks.

So what is a “Cherry Bomb”? “She’s the girl who doesn’t take shit ... the girl that’s gonna walk into the room, and she might not be the tallest, thinnest, prettiest, or perfectly put together, but she looks the sexiest and most confident because she exudes that ‘Hey, I’m a badass’ attitude,” explains Vrenna over lunch at the rock-chick-owned (no coincidence!) Auntie Em’s in Eagle Rock. “She goes against the grain sometimes and she’s just a li’l bit edgy, a li’l bit tougher. But at the same time, she isn’t a bitch, and she isn’t a whore.”

Indeed, we’re not talking groupies here, though dating musicians and even how to get — and act — backstage at a concert is covered. Borzillo-Vrenna knows of what she writes too; her husband is Nine Inch Nails/Marilyn Manson drummer Chris Vrenna. Other fun contributions include Dita Von Teese on how to do a proper striptease, Kat Von D on tats and “tramp stamps,” Katy Perry’s vintage-fashion faves, Samantha Maloney drum lessons, Lisa Loeb on party hosting, and Vrenna’s alter ego, “Gotha Stewart,” on mixing absinthe cocktails and rolling the perfect joint. Vrenna, whose résumé includes writing for Spin, People and Billboard, and a stint at Gene Simmons’ short-lived Tongue magazine (as a sex-advice columnist), has taken the fluffy and tired genre known as “grrrl guides” (the girl-powery nonfiction sister to chick lit) and given it claws — black, of course. And while us, ahem, riper cherries already know most of this stuff — how to get into clubs, how to make a great entrance, the hierarchy that exists between lead singers, guitarists, bassists and drummers (it goes in that order, duh!) — for the barely legal Hot Topic generation, this li’l purple and black confection might just be life-changing.

Wanna get inspired? Put on some black fishnets and some Russian Red lipstick and spy these juicy anecdotes and smart tips (along with some of the book’s (t)arty illustrations, by Liz Adams):


Terri Nunn on “Doing It”

“I wrote a whole song about the power of role-playing. ‘Sex (I’m A ...)’ came about because my boyfriend at the time and I fell into a bit of a rut sexually, so I tried to introduce some role-playing. After a couple of nights of this, he said, ‘Terri, I’m not a pirate. I’m not a burglar. I’m just a guy. I just like guy things.’ Great. If you notice in the song, all he says in the chorus is, ‘I’m a man, I’m a man, I’m a man.’ BOOOORRRRIINNNNGG! I’m all kinds of things, a bitch, geisha, blue movie, Goddess, virgin ... Fuck you! I’m interesting. He laughed at the song, and we did eventually try some more fun scenes in bed.”


Tori Amos on Keeping a Creative Center

“When we wake up in the morning, we can either choose to ‘plug in’ to the creative source or to ‘plug in’ to a chaotic force. If you don’t consciously choose this, then you will be drawn into chaos before lunch and you’ll have no idea how you got there. Energy follows intention. I wake up, I take the 10 minutes it takes — in the shower, putting on makeup, before I go out — to set my intentions, what I will and won’t accept energy-wise. There is not one way that is the right way to do this. But if you are aligned with a creative source, then it’s very hard to seduce you into destructive conversations, arguments and reactions.

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  • Charles 05/22/2011 12:52:00 AM

    I love cheri and wished i could one day meet her she still as beatiful as she used to be and deep see ya out their one day Charles Hedrick Tuscaloosa Al 205 657-8100

  • Samantha 08/26/2008 12:35:00 PM

    umm, is it just me or is this gross? I mean, it kinda sounds more like "a girls guide to star-f**king"... ummm, it's just gross.

  • Margaret Wynn 08/12/2008 1:10:00 AM

    This is staggeringly, jaw-droppingly lame. Girls need an instruction manual on how to play a baddass, edgy, Rock Star Girlfriend? I see no mention here of actually developing your own talent and creativity, just how to play dress up. Why, so all the white picket fence loving future soccer moms of America can get themselves a real Rock Musician Dude and proceed to make both of them miserable by forcing him to keep normal hours, get a nice corporate real job, pop out 2.5 adorable children and then pout, whine and sulk when he wants to rehearse, tour, do band stuff, drink too much, drive a clunker or any other behavior that the girls found dangerous and alluring in the first place. Or perhaps she should just write the boys' version of this.

  • mike 08/11/2008 12:12:00 PM

    sounds like a real joke

 

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