It’s after midnight at Dimples karaoke bar, and you’ve just witnessed a second group of incoherent college girls stumble through a vodka-tonic-infused version of “My Humps.”
As you sit waiting for your tab, silently longing for the day when Fergie finally gives up music to make snuff films, a familiar figure suddenly strolls to the stage. He’s a little older than you remember and he’s put on a couple of pounds, but . . . no, it can’t be. Is that . . . Mr. Belding? And is he singing . . . ”Piano Man”? It is!
“This place is myCheers,” the beloved Dennis Haskins ofSaved by the Bellrenown explains after his song. “I’m in here all the time.”
To prove it, he calls over nearly every single person in the bar: Sal the owner, Kim the bartender, Erin the hostess, Allison the waitress (who you and Mr. B agree is arguably the most stunning server you’ve ever seen), the Fu Manchued DJ, the flower guy, the dishwasher.
“I’ve been coming here for about five years,” he says of the bar that bills itself as the first karaoke club in America. “It’s a place I can just have fun and no one will really bother me. I love doing Alice Cooper. A little ‘School’s Out for the Summer’ — you know, because of the show and all.”
You think about suggesting he sing it, but before you can ask, Mr. B is off to the other end of the bar to take some photos and chat up a cute blonde. As you stare, mouth agape, Allison the stunning waitress stops by to fill you in.
“Dennis is really popular here,” she says. “All the girls come up to him because of the show.”
No sooner does she mention this than Mr. B arrives back at your table with a beautiful, dark-skinned, Iranian Saved by the Bell fan in tow.
“I’m a little tired,” he says. “I think I’m going to take off.”
He does, leaving you to converse with said Iranian beauty. Never has your night gone from Screech to Zack Morris so quickly.
Good show, Mr. B. Good show.
3413 W. Olive Ave., Burbank, (818) 842-2336. Open 6 p.m.-2 a.m. nightly.