The Queen of the Globes

Angelina Jolie appears to suppress her own vomit in royal fashion as she condescends to a Ryan Seacrest red-carpet chat.

The whole purpose of red-carpet interviews, especially at an event like the Golden Globes, is to tease a sense of nonseriousness or piss-taking out of celebrities. Sometimes you even get them to show a bit of giddiness. We want to see these glamorous aliens enjoying themselves and the process because we know that these televised awards are a big reason movies like Babeland Blood Diamond and Dreamgirls get made — people crave getting to a night like this.

So I like it when Drew Barrymore (there to hawk an upcoming movie) responds to an interviewer’s compliment about her dress with, “Well, we’ll see what they say tomorrow!” We say, yes, that’s right, you’re acknowledging you care what people think. Drew, you’re okay. Move on.

And there’s Isaiah Washington, joking to E!’s Ryan Seacrest that he and his Grey’s Anatomy co-star/co-tussler Patrick Dempsey have an arrangement to stay 150 yards away from each other tonight. Yes! Ha-ha! Even better! Riffing on your personal humiliation! As far as I’m concerned, Isaiah, you’ve earned the right to pants Dempsey in a moment of your choosing!

Now, as for Brad and Angelina, I was surprised they even bothered to approach Seacrest, and I’ll admit to feeling nervous for the American Idol sprite: Do you go serious with these two? Ask something silly? Seacrest started out respectfully, asking about Babel, then adding a softball about negotiating family and Hollywood, which I guess was supposed to make these international dignitaries on a break from their humanitarian crusades feel good again about glitz and stardom. Brad looked like he could go either way: He was bored, but at one point he looked to Jolie, and I’m almost positive it was to feel out a vibe. Meanwhile, Jolie, ex–blood-vial wearer, had such a hilarious air of gray-dressed condescension to her when she added a Continental-accented “Cereal, we made cereal” to the small talk about that morning’s family breakfast that it was like watching Helen Mirren’s Elizabeth II in The Queen suppressing her own vomit in having to dignify the people’s will. I give points to Brad for trying to save the exchange with a joke about how his plan is to raise a World Cup team, but I wish he’d pointed to his right and added, “And this one can bend it like Beckham, if you know what I mean, huh? Huh?”

 
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