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Stuff to Do Before Snakes On a Plane Opens 

Wednesday, Aug 9 2006
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FRIDAY, August 11

Free-ice-cream alert! As part of the YarisWorks Tour, the ?Ice Cream Man will be giving out the stuff all over town to hip, P.C., corporate types. Thanks to Toyota, the YarisWorks Tour offers all kinds of cutesy “clinics, collaborations, celebrations,” such as “Tough Guy Poetry with Chapbook-Making,” how to recycle old vinyl and CDs into art, sock-monkey making, filmmaking — you get the idea. Some events happen simultaneously, so choose carefully. Various locations; thru Aug. 12.; www.yarisworks.com.

SATURDAY, August 12

Who doesn’t love a talent show? This fellow Griff O’Neil, who once produced the Miss Universe Pageant, knows the appeal of wannabe stars. So he organized this ambitious international event dubbed the World Championships of Performing Arts, a clumsily named “Olympic-like competition” with categories in dance, vocals, modeling, acting, instrument-playing and variety. Personally, you could not pay me to actually go, but I understand how this type of contest has become quite popular with audiences, and it’s not inconceivable that some contestant may be the next Judy Garland (okay, that’s a stretch). Hollywood Palladium, 6215 Sunset Blvd., Hollywood; Sat., Aug. 12, 7 p.m.; $75 (what??). (323) 960-5557.

Fiesta Argentina de Tango a Malambo is not only much cheaper than the World Championships of Performing Arts — which I am starting to hate — but features actual proven talent. It promises “a total immersion in Argentine culture,” including tango singer Esther Segovia, famed pianist José Luis “Pepe” Motta, Julian Cordoba y Las Cuerdas del Sol and the Otero Dance Company. Free tango lessons and Argentine food for sale complete the experience. John Anson Ford Amphitheater, 2580 Cahuenga Blvd. East, Hollywood; Sat., Aug. 12, 8 p.m.; $32 & $40. (323) 461-3673.

SUNDAY, August 13

Nisei Week kicked off yesterday, and that means Little Tokyo will swell like a sumo belly full of dumplings: a luxury-car show (Sat., Aug. 12), a sumo demonstration (Sun., Aug. 13), a grand parade (Sun., Aug. 13), and a street arts festival with crafts and food (Sat.-Sun., Aug. 19-20). The festival closes out with a big “New Generation Remix” (Sat., Aug. 19) with taiko, music and dance, and finally a giant taiko show (Sun., Aug. 20) and street dancing. In conjunction is the Tofu Festival, which this year adds a wi-fi scavenger hunt and a celebrity-chef cooking stage. You can try tofu variations from more than 40 vendors, all of whom attempt to hide the fact that the stuff is still just jiggly and tasteless. Little Tokyo, downtown; Sat.-Sun., Aug. 12-13 & 19-20. For complete schedules: www.niseiweek.org and www.tofufestival.com.

MONDAY, August 14

This Film Is Not Yet Rated, the acclaimed snake-and-plane-less documentary about the MPAA rating system, screens as part of “Reel Talk With Stephen Farber,” to a film-savvy crowd who will try their hardest to pretend not to care about Snakes on a Plane. The guest speaker is director Kirby Dick. Wadsworth Theater, on the Veterans Administration grounds, 11301 Wilshire Blvd., West L.A.; Mon., Aug. 14, 7 p.m.; $20. (213) 365-3500.

TUESDAY, August 15

Ladies and gentlemen . . . The Comedians of Comedy. Patton Oswalt, Zach Galifianakis and Brian Posehn fancy themselves rock stars and continue to take their standup to music clubs rather than the standard two-drink-minimum ha-ha-ditorium. This was a good move for these guys, because it just makes them all the more attractive to potential groupies. Mr. Oswalt reports, “It’s the traveling show, even more relaxed and fun ’cuz we’re in our hometown. It’s me and Zach and Brian plus a lot of special guests, like Bob Odenkirk, Morgan Murphy and Doug Benson. Plus some surprises. You’ll see.” The Troubadour, 9081 Santa Monica Blvd., W. Hollywood; Tues., Aug. 15, 8 p.m.; $18, $16 in advance. (310) 276-6168.

WEDNESDAY, ?August 16

Snakes on a Plane takes off in two days. If you haven’t uttered “snakes” “on” “a” “plane” yet — try it. You can’t even say the title of this movie without getting giddy! Get together with like-minded SOAP-heads at the Snakes on a Plane Album Release Party. Cobra Starship will perform their appropriately giddy single “Snakes on a Plane (Bring It),” and who knows, maybe Samuel L. Jackson will show up and yell, “I have had it with these muthafuckin’ snakes on this muthafuckin’ plane!” The Key Club, 9039 Sunset Blvd., W. Hollywood; Wed., Aug. 16, 7 p.m.; $15. (310) 274-5800.

THURSDAY, August 17

Tonight, the red carpet rolls out at the Mann Grauman’s Chinese Theater for that little movie about airborne anacondas. If you’re not invited to the premiere — and at this point, I sure as heck better be — try to take your mind off it with a little art, photography, fashion, performance and film at Gen Art’s Ignite! Palms & Pearls. Sono-Lux perform, Michelle Pesce deejays, and the edge is promised to be cutting all evening. The Music Box at the Henry Fonda Theater, 6126 Hollywood Blvd., Hollywood; Thurs., Aug. 17, 8 p.m.-mid.; VIP reception, 7-8 p.m.; $30, $25 in advance; $75 VIP. (310) 601-3213; www.genart.org.

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