6. The White House admits that the president’s plan to bankrupt America by privatizing Social Security could cost taxpayers at least $1 trillion.
7. Congress passes intelligence bill that will create an all-powerful spy czar, institute national ID cards and expand federal wiretapping activities.
8. Following an NPR exposé, the Department of Homeland Security says it will stop the use of attack dogs to harass detainees in its immigrant holding centers — but not right away.
9. Congress takes back $1 billion from the Children’s Health Insurance Program, removing 200,000 low-income children from coverage.
10. Congressman Henry Waxman reveals that American teens are told by federally funded abstinence-only sex-ed programs that, among other things, a 43-day fetus is a thinking person, that women who have had an abortion are more prone to suicide and that condoms fail to prevent HIV infection a third of the time during straight sex.
11–13. Philadelphia cops handcuff and arrest a 10-year-old girl for bringing scissors to school, while a Florida cop shoots an uncooperative 6-year-old with a 50,000-volt Taser. At LAX a 78-year-old man is Tasered while arguing with airport cops after his car has been impounded.
8 Famous People Whose Smiles Give the Willies More Than Should Be Reasonably Expected
1. Nicolas Cage. He’d be less creepy if he weren’t trying so hard to look happy/sad/angry or creepy.
2. Michael Eisner. Something about him is just so creepy.
3. Michael Ovitz. Something about him is just so creepy.
4. John Travolta. It’s not clear whether he knows who he is, and that’s creepy.
5. Jennifer Love Hewitt. Proof you can be pretty and still be creepy.
6. Catherine Zeta-Jones. Look away from the phone ads! Yikes, she’s creepy.
7. Snoop Dogg. When he sneers it’s creepy, but when he smiles it’s still creepy.
8. Paris Hilton. I’d feel sorry for her except she’s creepy.
—June Melby
Love and Hate, L.A. Style
26 Missed Connections Posted on CraigsList
• You were at McDonald’s and I working the drive through
• You blessed me on the train
• You: girl by your pool in manhattan beach. I was on the 747 that flew over
• You were that girl at Coffee Bean that one time or was it Starbucks?
• In the mosh pit at the POND
• You brought me bacon 11/26/04
• I grabbed your boobs on Sunset
• Sparks flew as I was shoved into a Grand Cherokee
• You layed on me twice and gave me fake numbers
• I don’t know why I still dream about you
• I wish we would have
• You robbed me of my innocence, and . . .
• You really hurt my feelings
• We could’ve fucked, but you got hit by a car
• I OD’d on love when I saw you OD at my party
saturday night!
• "Making out with you killed my dog"
• Andrew . . . I am wondering . . . cause the way u looking at me, r u gay?
• Looking for WOLF, painter of marine life
• A "smiley" nachos-eating canadian
• Pablo and his tamales at the 99 Cent Store
• To the HORROR who slept with my man the other night
• You: deer, me: guy in car
• My neighbor with his snooze button
• Russian man who translated an entire movie to his wife
• Dear Mr. Peepers from across the street
• Balcony masturbator on Fuller near Runyon Cyn.
—Justin Clark
To be perused with coffee before venturing out into the world of insanely tilted corp-media blare
DailyKos.com.Most comprehensive spot for free thinking on the Web
MyDD.com.dailyKos’ guru — ’nuff said
TBogg.blogspot.com/. "a daily dose of snark" — the Internet’s version of Jon Stewart
Http://majikthise.typepad.com — Punk rock plus lefty politik plus secular humanism is GO!
Jameswolcott.com. Vanity Fair guy in open space
Atrios.blogspot.com. Best back-and-forth forum anywhere
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