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“I like what Toxic Teddies are doing,” said Macaluso.

“And we love what he’s doing,” said Ruddy. We entered a backroom, shielded from the convention floor, containing an array of naked dolls based on full-body laser scans of famous porn stars. Each measured an impressive 7.5 inches — tall — with fully articulated sex organs modeled on the originals. Except for the Ron Jeremy doll.

“He couldn’t get it up,” said Macaluso. “I had to mold that one by hand.”

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Weren’t porn-star dolls a bit out of place at a comic convention?

“At this point, it’s just another part of fringy pop culture,” said Macaluso. “These are available at Tower, Virgin and Spencer’s Gifts. One girl had Steph sign her tits.”

Outside, the kewpie-faced porn star Stephanie Swift posed for pictures, directing her come-hither gaze at each photographer in turn. As I walked by, we locked eyes. And at last I felt satisfied, having shared at least that one intimate moment.

—Alec Hanley Bemis

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